30 : The Anchor Lakey

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23rd December 2017

THE ANCHOR LAKEY: Episode 60

Intro: A segment of Ludovico Einaudi's "Fly" is played on the piano over a track of rustling trees and whispering.

SUKIE:

Hi, guys, and welcome back to The Anchor Lakey! If you're still tuning in then, wow, thank you. It could just be that you've got nothing better to do, but maybe you're interested in what we have to say.

OLIVER:

Even when what we say has very little to do with the podcast you guys actually signed up to. Nearly every week, Sukie asks me if I'm going to come over to record an episode, and nearly every week I ask her what the episode's about this time, and you know how many times she actually has a plan?

[Sukie laughs]

SUKIE:

All right, all right, Mr Grumpy Pants. I'm sorry that I don't always have a direction when I start recording. I think it's better if this is organic – I want us to be real. We're not reciting some pre-planned speech. We're going with the flow.

OLIVER:

Which is a sure-fire way of saying that we're winging it. Let's be honest, we don't know any more than you guys. We've all read the book. We've all shared our theories and ideas, and we're getting nowhere.

SUKIE:

Except you're getting somewhere.

OLIVER:

Huh?

SUKIE:

I'm devastated to announce that our very own Oliver Day, resident cynic, is officially to university next year – he's only gone and landed himself a place at bloody UCL, of all places.

[Oliver laughs]

OLIVER:

I can't help it if I'm smart.

SUKIE:

I can't believe that in nine months, you're going to abandon me. Have you no loyalty for Anchor Lake?

[There's a long pause]

OLIVER:

Um ... no? You know me, Sukes. I think this town is a death sentence, and so does your fave, Mary Nesbitt, and I advocate getting the hell out of here. It's not too late for you to apply to uni. I mean, I've already put it off for a year. We could both get out of here.

SUKIE:

It's not for me. Newsflash, listeners – university isn't the answer for everyone. I don't know what I want to do with my life, and my marks were the epitome of average, so what's the point of going to uni just for the sake of it? I didn't go when I finished S6; I didn't go this year; I'm not going to go next year.

OLIVER:

At the very least, it's an excuse to get out. Four generations of my family have lived and died in this town. None of them have ever left; none have ever gone to uni. I have to break out. I don't want to spend my whole life here.

PSA, followers of The Anchor Lakey – if you have an opportunity to get out of this town, take it.

SUKIE:

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