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All day. All fucking day Tommy had been giving Lucille a hard time.
If Polly wasn't around; insults about her appearance.
If the kids weren't around; insults about her parenting.
If John wasn't around; insults about 'keeping it in the family'.
It was non-fucking-stop. And she'd had enough.
They were in the kitchen together and, when Thomas was in the middle of saying something about Lucille and John's relationship, she cut him off with a yell.
"Fucking stop!" She yelled at him and his mouth snapped shut out of shock. She never used to yell at him like that; not with that tone. "I've had enough, Thomas!"
Silence was all that followed her projected voice. Polly could hear them from the living area in the betting den house and sent both Tommy and John's kids into the back garden so that they wouldn't be able to witness what was happening in the home.
"Can't handle a little insult anymore, Scotland? Eh?"
The way he spoke to her and the way he spat out the same nickname that John used lovingly made Lucille feel sick to her stomach. This wasn't the same Thomas that she remembered.
"Stop." Her voice wavered and she tried so hard not to cry. She didn't want to look weak in front of him. She wasn't weak. "Just stop, Tom."
The softness of her voice and the way she used one of his nicknames as she spoke to him sent a pang through his heart and he knew that she was hurt by what he was saying but he couldn't stop.
'I want her to feel just as horrible and as heart broken as I did when she left'.
"You hid my brother from me." Somehow, the more he spoke the more venomous his words began to sound and the more intimidating his pointed finger began to look. "I thought he was dead!"
"Do not fucking yell at me, Thomas! I didn't know who he was then!"
Polly could still hear the shouting inside the house despite the fact she was outside and surrounded by eight screaming children.
John, poor John, had waltzed through the door with a happy smile on his face at the wrong time with Finn and Arthur in tow.
"Oh, look! Here he is; my dead brother." As soon as Thomas had addressed him, John's smile faltered and he grew uncomfortable almost immediately at the feel of the atmosphere in the house. "Does he know about us? About your life before you left us all here?"
"Tom," John tried to speak but Tommy was having none of it.
"Yes, he knows. He knows more about me and my life than you ever did."
If words could cut then both Thomas and Lucille would be bleeding out as they spoke.
"And what about our little life? Eh? Does he know about that? Does he?!" His voice grew colder and louder but he knew that he had struck a soft spot when Lucille grew quiet and timid looking.
Lucille knew exactly what he was talking about and she knew that she hadn't told John about the life she was once growing that was half of her and half of Tommy.
'She hasn't told him about our baby' Thomas thought to himself.
"Please..." Words where whispered as she tried so desperately to stop him from bringing back the pain she had gotten so used to living with every day. "Please Thomas."
"Tell him." She didn't speak. "TELL HIM!"
Thomas' arm was pointing, throwing itself around and his face showed nothing but pure anger and hurt. Even his three brothers could see what he was feeling.
Finn was terrified. His eyes were wide with fear at the sight of Tommy going off on one at someone he once loved more than anyone in this world.
Arthur, bless his soul, didn't know what to do. He just stood with his hands in his pockets and looking anywhere but the two arguing bodies in front of him.
And John... All he felt was confusion. Lucille had told him literally everything about her past life and he felt guilty for lying to her about his past and who he was. So, when he finally came clean, his conscious was clear also.
However, it was slowly beginning to sink in that she hadn't told him everything like he had thought.
"What's he talking about, Luce?" John's voice was confused and mumbled as he spoke.
He wanted her to look at him, to tell him that everything Tommy was saying was bullshit and that he was just looking to cause drama like he usually does.
But she didn't.
"Shall I just tell him?" Lucille's head was bowed as she concentrated on the floor and silently cried to herself. "Lucille was pregnant with my kid, John. She was gonna have my child before she left us all here in this shit hole."
Lucille let out a sob, looking up to the ceiling in hopes of two things; 1 - That, somehow, that would help stop her waterfall of tears flowing down her cheeks and; 2 - A miracle would happen where this was all a sick, twisted dream and she would wake up and everything would be fine again.
Neither of those two things happened.
"Is that true?"
John was hurt and he felt like his heart was being squashed between his brothers hands but he wasn't upset or angry with Lucille. He was upset and angry with Thomas.
"I'm sorry, John." Lucille's voice broke as she finally turned around to face her lover and the sight he was met with broke his heart more than anything. "I'm so, so sorry."
"Can you lot piss off." John had decided that he would only be able to comfort Lucille if it were just the two of them left alone.
One by one, each brother left the room. Arthur, then Finn and finally Thomas after he stood with a glare and crossed arms for a little minute longer.
"I'm sorry."
"Come 'ere you." Without having to be asked again, Lucille ran to John and threw herself into his chest and sobbed as he wrapped one arm around her shoulders and the other held her head close to his heart. "You have nothing to be sorry for, love. Don't apologise."
"I should have told you." She wailed against his chest.
The cries and sobs of Lucille echoed through the whole house and flooded the feeling of immense pain and hurt throughout the whole house and betting den.
Polly could hear her cried from outside and could feel the hurt and the pain that the Scot was feeling and her heart broke for the poor girl.
Hugging her and just being there for her in general was all that John could do (other than reassuring her) but he felt like it wasn't enough.
"Listen to me;" John pulled her away from his chest, wiped the tears from her cheeks and held her face gently in his hands. "I do not care about that you have a past with the Peaky Blinders. I do not care that you have loved someone that wasn't me and I do not care that you have a past with my brother."
"John-"
He cut her off.
"No. Just listen. I don't care about any of those things because I know who you are and I know who you love and what you want and I'll be by your side for as long as you'll have me to help you through life. Alright?"
Lucille nodded and smiled sadly.
"I'm sorry I didn't tell you." John just pulled her in for a quick, sweet kiss and then a hug. "I just didn't want to talk about it when I'd tried so hard to learn to live with that pain day in and day out."
