The Boy and his Beast

35. Hot and bothered

(Ben's POV)

Without warning he take the whole thing in his mouth and suck it harshly before his tongue lets it slide out. I cry out in pleasue and my hips tense at the sensation. Kellan's tongue lick at my shaft and he slides me in and out of his mouth, making me shiver. 

The slimy feel of his tongue wrap around my memeber and I feel him suck with passion. He releases me from his mouth and grabs my little wand with his hand, guiding it to his lips again. 

This time he flicks his tongue over the tip of my shaft and I gasp at the feeling. It's so intense and he keeps teasing the head of my cock while I strain against the covers, trying to hold my moans in. 

"Mhm! Ah! Ye-yes! Please... Kellan, AH!" I whine and dig my hands into the soft sheets. I fall onto my back and gasp for air but he keeps working on the little me. I feel him take all of me inside his mouth and attack me with his tongue again. 

It feels so good I could cry. I want to tell him, to talk dirty and turn him on. Acting like this for him is so much harder than he thinks. It takes everything for me to trust that he won't abuse me, and even more so to trust that he won't start seeing me as a whore to use whenever, however he wants to. 

He presses a sucking kiss to the tip of my member again and I shake from my core at the explosion of pleasure. He smiles, licking his lips as he climbs up again, aligning our faces. I hold my breath and wait for his amazing kiss but it doesn't come. 

When I open my eyes I'm met by the sight of his lustfilled gaze ravishing my body. He's practically eating me up with his now burning amber eyes. I suck in a quick breath as I grow hot and bothered under his stare. 

With a quivering and weak resolution I spread my legs even farther. My hands snake down my chest and rub everywhere that feels good. I let my horny mood guide me as I try to make myself sexy for him. 

When he growls with lust I watch his throat vibrate with the sound. It echoes over my skin and up my spine, and my body sings with exstacy. I know that I'm made to react to that sound, that it's all a biological respons to my mate in pleasure but I can't help loving it. 

He's resting on his arms over me and happily drinking up the sight of me pleasuring myself. It spurs me on and I feel the pressure. I avert my eyes and shut them to concentrate on feeling good but it's hard. This doesn't come as easy as it should but I really want to do it. It's so frustrating. 

I want to be sexy and I do feel sexy when Kellan growls like I'm the hottest thing he's ever seen, but a part of me hates feeling like the dirty whore they used as they liked. It's not that I don't want to be slutty, it's just that I can't let go of the feeling that I'm doing something wrong. 

"Benjamin?" Kellan calls on my attention and I realize I'm crying. Hating myself for being like this I curl up into a little shrimp. "It's fine; I won't do anything scary. Baby? Please. I'm going to hug you now" he coos and scoops me up in his arms again. 

We're back to him sitting against the headboard of the bed with me in his arms and tears streaming down my cheeks again. The selfhatred flows within me like rivers during rainseason. 

"I-I really w-wanted to..." I sob against him. All the pleasure has run out now and I just feel scared and disgusting. Kellan must think I'm such a gross whore who can't do anything right.  

"I know, but we did a lot and I'm so glad you did that. I will never forget how sexy you are. I haven't felt this good ever before" he coos and kisses the top of my head again. 

I want to tell him to continue and fuck me but a part of me knows he won't do that. I'm scared that he isn't satisfyed at all but an even smaller part of me know that he won't be disappointed by something like this. 

The feeling of safety I get when I rest in his arms is something I've never felt before. I know he won't hurt me. I know that he's not unhappy with my flaws. 

And most importantly, he loves me. 

"I love you, Kellan" I murmur against the warm skin of his chest. 

"I love you too, more than you could possibly imagine" he claims and hugs me tighter. I feel the dun-dun-dun of his heart and the cozy rythm makes me fall asleep on his chest. 

Someday I will be able to mate with him without breaking down like this, and I know that Kellan will wait for me and be there every step on the way.