The Healing Ranch

Chapter 35

Later that evening, Megan sat on the porch all alone. She thought of what Tate had told her, and ached for the family that sat inside, laughing and talking together. They had been through some of the worst circumstances that she could imagine and had managed to come out of it strong. It was their last night in Texas and Megan could tell that it bothered Tate to be leaving now when everything had started to work out. Adele was over again this evening and Megan had enjoyed watching Tate play with his niece and nephew. He was sweet with the kids and she could tell he loved them a lot. She loved being with his family, but still somewhere deep inside was the ache that she no longer had her own family.

"Megan?" The door behind her creaked open and she turned, a little startled. She was surprised to see Lissa standing in the doorway, outlined by the light spilling out of the kitchen. Inside Cassie squealed and the adults laughed. Lissa glanced over her shoulder before slipping out the door and shutting it softly behind her.

"Hey. What's up?" Megan felt uncomfortable around the girl, as she hadn't spoken more than a hello during the whole time she had been here. Megan also knew how much the girl disliked her, even thought she couldn't quite understand why.

"I just came out here to apologize." Lissa spoke softly, and moved to sit on the step. Megan shifted in her wheelchair, before moving a little closer to the step so she could talk to the girl better. Surprise washed over her at the words.

"Apologize? For what?" Lissa scoffed at her words and Megan immediately wished she could take them back.

"Don't play stupid. We both know that I've been rude to you the whole time you've been here. I'm here to apologize for that." Megan blinked hard at the girl's bluntness before forcing herself to reply.

"Okay I guess that was pretty dumb of me. But honestly, don't worry about it. I get that what your family has gone through is really hard and I also understand that it can't be easy welcoming a newcomer, especially when she comes with your brother who you haven't gotten to be with for 3 years. Don't feel like you have to apologize to me just because your mom made you." Megan chuckled a little bit, although the situation didn't really call for laughing.

"My mama didn't tell me to come out here. I wanted to. I don't have any excuses for my behavior and I really am sorry." Lissa seemed uncomfortable and she scratched the back of her neck while she stared off into the yard.

"Apology accepted. Like I said, I get it." The two sat there for a long time staring into the darkness before Megan spoke again.

"You should go back inside. Be with your family. It's our last night here and then I guess I'll be taking Tate away again." She said it as a joke, but as she said it, the reality of the words hit her hard. She wanted to go home, and Tate would come with her to help her. She knew he didn't want to leave and she knew how hard it must be to let him go. Suddenly she felt ashamed that she was taking him away.

"You really believe that huh?" Lissa mused and then turned to look at Megan for the first time since she had gotten outside. "You need to know something about my brother. He does not do what he doesn't want to do. You aren't takin him away. He's goin willingly. But I guess if I should be in there, so should you." The words surprised Megan and she looked at Lissa.

"What do you mean?"

"I might've been young when Tate left and when the accident happened. But through it all I understood that my brother has a spirit that won't quite be broken. It seemed like everything people told him not to do, he would do it. Mama would warn him not to go into town. He'd go anyway. He'd get into a fight with somewhere there because they blamed him. He'd get arrested. Finally Dad told him to get out, that they had to try hard enough to get him out of the mess he had landed himself in and told him how hard they had to fight to get him free from charges and jail time after what happened with Jake. Said that him fighting at the drop of a hat didn't help matters. Mama begged him to stay. Tate left and just didn't come back." The words shocked Megan, even though the part about not making Tate do anything wasn't what she had asked about.

"I didn't know." She whispered. She hadn't realized that Tate had gotten kicked out by his dad. He had just told her that there were too many arguments, too many fights. She hurt more for Tate then ever before as she finally pieced together the complicated relationship Tate had with his dad.

"Most people don't. Most people don't realize how close this family was to falling apart after the accident." Megan thought of how wary Tate was when seeing his dad again. But she also remembered the way he had apologized for leaving and how Brett had told him to never blame himself again, and the way Brett had had tears in his eyes.

"But.. Tate apologized for leaving when we got here." She was confused and Lissa shook her head a little.

"Because he knew that Dad didn't mean what he said. He knew that dad didn't actually want to kick him out. And deep down he knew, we all knew, that if he wanted to stay he would have. Dad's saying that just gave him a reason to leave and not come back, one we all knew he was looking for. None of us believed for a second that Tate left because of dad. He just does things that he wants. That's why none of us believe that you are making him leave or taking him away. If Tate wanted to stay he would. If he wanted to leave you he would. And if he didn't love you, he would never say that he does." Tears gathered in Megan's eyes at the earnest words of the girl sitting before her. Surprisingly, the blunt statement reassured her more than anything Caroline, Cole, or even Tate had said to try convince her that she was good enough for Tate.

"You really mean that?" She asked in a whisper and Lissa nodded.

"Yep." She stood up and turned towards Megan. "Anyway, I'm sorry for treating you like I did. I was angry with Tate because he left us, but it felt like I couldn't be mad at him when he had gone through so much. Mama and Dad tried to hide the fact that he tried to commit suicide a couple times from me, but it wasn't that hard to figure out. I decided the next best thing was to pretend that you kept him away from us and hate you instead. I know how wrong I was."

"It's okay." Megan whispered and Lissa just shrugged.

"No it's not really." She started heading inside, but when she got to the door she stopped and turned. "I meant what I said about you belonging in there as much as I do. I know you feel a little out of place sometimes but you shouldn't. I don't know if you have a big family back home or not, but you are one of us now. You brought him home, you've been taken in. Just a warning, this family is messed up in so many ways even though we put on a perfect charade. But I have a feeling maybe it's going to start getting better. Even if you didn't want to be apart of us you have no choice." She shot a grin over her shoulder before disappearing inside, the door slamming shut behind her.

"I belong in there." Megan whispered the words to the darkness, tears trickling down her cheeks. Her heart ached both for her own family that was no more, and for her 'new family' who had taken her in because their son loved her and they loved him. She hurt for what they had been through and realized now that they weren't the perfect close knit family she thought they were. In reality, they were broken and just learning what family meant again. She smiled a teary smile at the stars before turning and following Lissa back inside. Tate immediately got up from where he was sitting and came to her, hugging her close before lifting her out of her wheelchair and settling her into his lap. He nuzzled into her, ignoring his families jokes and Megan's embarrassed pleads. Caroline beamed at them from across the room, and even Lissa and Adele smiled at them warmly. Cassie begged Megan to read her a book and Gunner made a joke about a new niece or nephew in the near future, looking directly at Tate and Megan. Everyone laughed and even though her cheeks burned, Megan was happy. Finally, she felt as if everything would be all right.

****

Early the next morning came tearful goodbyes and tight hugs from everyone. Even Lissa and Gunner hugged Megan goodbye. Tate looked sad to be leaving, but held Megan's hand and smiled at her reassuringly.

"Come back. Please come back." Caroline begged Tate and he smiled sadly down at her.

"I promise Mama. I'll always come back." When Caroline hugged Megan goodbye she held her close.

"I love you Megan. And thank you again from the bottom of my heart for bringing my boy home. Always remember your worth." She whispered and Megan felt a tear drip from her eye.

"I love you too. And I will." She responded. All too soon, they were leaving, waving goodbye as they drove down the road. Soon they would be back home and Megan couldn't tell just then if she was happy or sad about the idea.