Marva in the Garden

"Marva" is another one of the tapes from our "rare gems" collection, and to Grandpa, it's the best of all. Its full title is "Marva in the Garden." The guy behind the little mud show told Grandpa there was only one episode ever made, so that's the only one we have. Grandpa and I have watched it so many times, we have the whole thing memorized.

It starts out with the flowers in the garden singing a happy song. Then Marva, a little plump lady with brown hair who wears a red dress, pops out from behind a rose bush and says, "It's a sunshine mawnin'!" Then the music gets really jazzy and Marva dances with the happy flowers, trees, bushes, and animals, who she calls "the little creachas." The "little creachas" are a cat, a chipmunk, two squirrels, a cardinal, and a bluebird. Then Marva says, "Oh what shall I do on this lovely sunshine mawnin'?" She decides to have a macaroni party in the garden for her and the "little creachas."

A small oven full of hot coals appears in the garden. Marva puts a pot of hot water on the stove. "First thing," she says, "is ya hafta berl the water." (At that part, Grandpa always looks at me and says "I berl the water when I make the spaghetti.").
  
Marva then says she'll be right back; that she has to run home to get the stuff for the macaroni party.

As soon as she leaves, thunder shakes the garden and two giant feet in black shoes come stomping in. One of the feet kicks the pot of water off the stove and a mean, growly voice says, "They think they're gonna have themselves a macaroni party, eh? I'll show you a nice, hot time, MARVA!" (At this point, Grandpa always scrunches up his face and says "Bernardo..." like he smells something rotten).

Bernardo's giant hand then reaches down to a patch of grass by the rose bush, where it picks up a small metal can with a handle on it that says "OIL." ("That's the earl can," Grandpa says). Then Bernardo kicks over the oven and pours oil all over it. Sharp, orange flames shoot out in all directions. ("Whadya wanna do that for?" Grandpa calls out).

Everything shakes as Bernardo laughs his thunderous laugh. He runs away with his giant feet as the fire spreads and black clouds of smoke cover up the blue sky.

Meanwhile, Marva is on her way back to the garden by way of a wooded path, her arms full of cups and plates and boxes of macaroni. She whistles a cheerful tune as little hearts and music notes float out of her mouth. ("She don't know what's she's in for," Grandpa says. "The poor goyle.")

She stops whistling when she sees the clouds of black smoke in the distance. Dropping all the stuff, she runs to the garden. When she gets there, the garden looks like a heap of burnt charcoal.

"Oh Bernardo!" she cries. "How could you do it? To all the precious little creachas? To the flowahs and the trees and the bushes?" ("Because he's a doity coward!" Grandpa yells). Marva then sits on the ground beside the charred rosebush and sobs.

"How can life be so awwwful?" she cries. "There's nothing left to hope for!"

Just as she says that, it starts to rain. One of the squirrels comes limping out from behind a burnt tree. Then the other one comes out, coughing and covered in dirt. The cat comes in limping, with the chipmunk riding on his back, his little head hung low. Then the cardinal and the bluebird, whose colors are only visible in little patches under all the soot, come flying in trembling and low to the ground, each landing on either of Marva's shoulders. They all huddle together and cry as a song starts to play that is the saddest song I've ever heard. Then suddenly, it stops raining and a rainbow appears. Marva and the creatures look up at the rainbow. Then the tape just ends.