As Each Day Passes

Day 2

I woke up next to Harry sleeping soundly in his hospital bed. Everything was okay for a few seconds before I remembered what he told me the night before. My heart broke again.

-

"What? What do you need to tell me?" I asked. I felt a million emotions at once, confusion as to what was going on, frustration from knowing there had been a secret kept from me, but most of all, a feeling of dread that took over every nerve in my body.

"About a year ago, I was diagnosed with something called Tuberous sclerosis. Have you heard of it?"

My heart dropped.

A year ago?

He had kept this from me for a whole year?

I stood up away from him, letting go of his hand.

"What?" I whispered. This couldn't be real.

Harry's face dropped seeing me step away, and reached out to grab my hand again. I felt his eyes on my face and I sat back down next to him, unable to make eye contact with him. I heard him gulp before he continued.

"It's a rare genetic disease. It causes tumors to develop in different parts of the body. I got checked out a year ago when I found a lump on my neck, they've found a couple more since then."
Harry spoke softly, easing the information onto me. I looked into his baby blue eyes, the ones I loved so dearly. I took his hand as I took a deep breath, trying not to let the panic set in.

 
"So that's why you collapsed then? You have tumors? Why didn't you tell me sooner?" I whispered to him.
He squeezed my hand, offering me a small smile.
"I didn't want to worry you baby. Aaron has been taking me to my hospital appointments, I asked him to keep it a secret until I knew what was going on for sure."

 
I started to grow frustrated, I was upset and angry at the whole situation, I didn't understand why my own boyfriend would keep such a huge secret from me.

 
"Are you on medication? How have you hidden this from me?" I asked him. Harry glanced at me, looking uncomfortable as he started to play with my thumb.

 
"There's experimental medication that I could take, but I wanted to be more informed about my situation was and what my options were before I decided anything. Mum's uncle had the same thing, so she sort of knows what's going on too."

Andrea walked into the room as Harry spoke, I glanced up at her with teary eyes. She gave me a smile before sitting down next to Harry on the other side of the bed.

 
"My uncle Larry had the same benign tumors as Harry does, except his were in his lungs. Harry is lucky really, they didn't have the same level of medical research back then." Andrea informed me, taking Harry's other hand as she spoke. She looked at her son lovingly, giving his hand a squeeze. Harry smiled at her before looking back at me, waiting for me to respond.

 
"So what does this mean then?" I asked, growing more confused and panicked. "Is there an experimental trial you're going to take part in or something?"

Harry and Andrea looked at each other, and I saw Andrea give Harry another reassuring squeeze. My tears were starting to run down my face once more, unable to stay put. I rubbed the back of my hand against my face as I stepped away from Harry, moving into the room towards the window. I began to breath heavily, my emotions getting the better of me. Harry looked at me worriedly, hating the look on my face.

"Baby, because of where my tumors have grown, the doctors aren't sure whether the experimental treatment would work."

My ears started to get fuzzy, as if my head was underwater. I could vaguely tell that Harry was trying to speak to me, but I couldn't make out what he was saying. I sunk down to the floor, leaning against the wall. I stared at Harry, unable to process what was going on. I started to feel dizzy, the information too much for my brain to process. I looked down at my hands, trying to count my fingers to calm myself down. I vaguely heard the door open for the hospital room, but I was unable to lift my head up.