𝐅𝐞𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐞 - (𝐛𝐨𝐲𝐱𝐛𝐨𝐲)

Eighty Five

Gabi bites into her sandwich, "You really think it'll be a good idea? I mean, you're moms an asshole".

Elly shrugs, "I don't know, man. Jazmyne's parents are just like that and.. I don't wanna be on their bad side, you know?"

Lucas nods, "I get it but...I don't know, I get a bad feeling about her being cool with it the second you asked. Your mom isn't that type of person".

Benjamin and Noah walk over, sitting down next to the group. Benjamin let's go of Noah's hand and grabs his lunch box. Noah smiles and sits down next to him, throwing his arm around him.

Benjamin looks up, "What're we talking about?"

"Elly and her mom are having dinner with Jazmyne's family".

Benjamin furrows his brows, "What?"

Elly groans and covers her face. "Maybe I should cancel. I can just go myself. Without Ana".

Lucas looks over, "Didn't they exchange numbers?"

"Maybe it'll go good. I mean, my pops talked to her when he was down here. Maybe she's trying to come around to everything?"

Noah shrugs, "Guess we'll wait to find out".

**
Jazmyne dries her hands off and then walks back over the mirror to fix her hair. Zoē walks in, wiping tears from under her eyes.

Jazmyne looks over, "You okay?"

Zoē nods, "Oh, uh...Yeah, I'm...I'm fine. Sorry".

Jazmyne nods, "Okay. Are you sure?"

Zoē looks up at Jazmyne and furrows her brows. "Hey...Aren't you Benjamin's friend?"

"Oh, Uhm...Mutual friends. My uh girlfriend...Elly Guerra is friends with him".

Zoē nods, "Oh hm".

"D-Do I know you? Or?"

Zoē shakes her head, "Oh no...I just...Have seen you guys around each other and stuff".

Elly walks in the bathroom, visibly irritated, "Mamas can you hurry up? I'm fucking hungry-...Why are you talking to her?"

"Baby, she was crying I wasn't gonna leave her all by herself. I-".

"Don't listen to her, Jazmyne. She is full of shit. Come here".

Jazmyne looks over at Zoē and walks away and over to Elly. She grabs her hand and the two walk out the bathroom.

Jazmyne pulls her arm back and shakes her head. "What was the all about?"

"That's Zoē...As in the girl who fucked Benjamin over. That's the girl who left him for Katen".

"T-That's her? She seems so nice".

"That's what she does. She tried it with me when I moved here and after Noah had told me everything that happened. She tries to get you on her side".

Jazmyne frowns, "I didn't know".

Elly shakes her head, "It's okay...How could you know?"

**
Benjamin sits down in his bed, throwing off his shoes. "God, I can't stand her! She goes after every single fucking friend I make".

Noah walks in behind him, shutting the bedroom door. "Calm down, baby".

"Can they just get over me? I wish I never met either of them. Fuck".

Noah sits down in front of Benjamin on the bed and sighs. "I know, baby. I know".

Benjamin let's out a dry chuckle. "This is it! The universe just never wants me to be fucking happy. I can never be happy. I'm never gonna feel happy again".

"Hey, don't say that. Hey, what's going on?"

"I'm so fucking tired of being tired. A-and I'm tired of the therapist and the...the backhanded help from my parents and...The mistreatment at school. I'm just done".

Noah shakes his head, "Bebesita. Calm down".

"No! I'm so over this. Everyone is always telling me to have a backbone and to stop being so sensitive and I'm over it. I'm tired of pleasing people. They need to shut the fuck up and stop telling me how to feel and when to feel!"

Noah looks at him, nodding. "I understand. Really, I do".

"My dad is...So fucking mean to me and my mom just like...Endorses it now. It's like he is...Taking out all of his homophobic thoughts and just...Throwing them on me".

"I know. And I hate the way your parents make you feel. I wish I had the power to stop it and to make them realize they what they're doing is causing more harm than good".

Benjamin sighs and sits back, resting his back on his bed frame. "Sometimes I just think...And I know this is probably just internalized homophobia but...Things would be so much better if I just didn't come out".

Noah furrows his brows, "What?"

"M-My parents would still be married and...Kiara and I would still best friends...I wouldn't be bullied for my sexuality...".

"Don't say that. You wouldn't be happier. You would be in the closet and pretending to someone you aren't. Y-You wouldn't know where to fit in and you'd be lying to yourself".

Benjamin shrugs and looks down at his hands. He tears up and rolls his eyes at himself. Noah reaches over, lifting his chin up.

"Hey? Talk to me, please?"

Benjamin sighs, "I'm just...Over it. I don't wanna feel like this anymore. I-...I can't do it anymore".

"I know that right now it seems hard but you're gonna get through this. And you're gonna get through your parents being dumbasses. I promise".

"How? They patrol me like a prisoner".

Noah shrugs, "Coming from my Spanish household I wouldn't advise speaking up unless you want a chancla thrown at your face".

Benjamin giggles and wipes under his eyes.

"Maybe just...Stand your ground and speak to you about how you feel. Also, being cooped up in the house isn't gonna help you do much either. I'll talk to your mom about taking you out".

Benjamin nods, "Okay".

"Another thing. I remember when you got so excited about S.T.E.M...So...Maybe ask your teacher for a new project to work on".

Benjamin smiles. "There is a project that's for extra credit and...It would look great in college applications".

Noah smiles back. "See the way your face just lit up? I wanna see that more. You got this, bebesita".

Benjamin nods and smiles. Noah reaches forward and grabs his face to kiss him once. He pulls away and smiles. "Get up. I'm taking you out".

**
Benjamin walks downstairs hand-in-hand with Noah. Olivia looks over and furrows her brows. "What are you doing?"

Benjamin takes a gulp and shrugs, "I wanna go out with, Noah".

Olivia shakes her head, "No, Benjamin. Go upstairs before I call your father".

Benjamin looks up at Noah and shakes his head. "No".

Olivia turns her head, setting down her pen. "Excuse me?"

"I said...No". Benjamin let's go of Noah's hand and walks over to his mom. "I understand what I did was scary for you and dad and...I shouldn't have done it...I'm not a prisoner...I made a mistake and I'm trying to get better and keeping me cooped and...It isn't helping".

"Don't be ridiculous, Benjamin Evans. Upstairs now".

"And you and dad aren't helping either. When you do that. It doesn't help. Y-You guys make me wanna relapse when you treat me with disrespect and act like I don't have feelings".

"So it's my fault?"

"No, but...You could help a little more. Please. I just wanna go out with Noah and get something to eat...That's it, I promise".

Olivia sighs and nods, "Okay. Fine".

**