A/N- this is a short, filler chapter
~Ponyboy~
I felt bad as I stormed out of Emily's. But it doesn't matter. I'm mad at her. She underestimates me, just like everybody else.
"Ugh!" I screamed as I slammed my front door shut. Just thinking about it made my heart hurt and my head pound and feeling sick to my stomach. Or maybe the last two are totally unrelated to our argument, because I've been feeling those for a while.
It didn't matter. It doesn't matter. I have my mind made up: I'm never gonna talk to her again since she thinks I'm just a weak kid.
The thought of never talking to her again kind of hurt me though. But why? It's not like she would care. So why should I?
I slammed my fist on the door again in anger.
To try and clear my mind, I started making dinner. I would focus on the recipe and not Emily, and it would make Darry happy too.
After about half an hour, Soda came home.
"Hey Pone."
"Hey," I said with an attitude.
He rolled his eyes. "What's got you so pissed?" I just ignored him and he helped me cook in silence, knowing I didn't feel like cooking.
Just as we had finished, Darry got home. We all sat at the table and ate dinner. It was a little later than we usually try to eat because Darry was working later. It was almost 8:30. Darry and Soda talked about their work stuff I think, I don't really know I wasn't listening.
Afterward, Soda and I went up to our room as Darry cleaned up. We both changed into a t shirt and boxers and got ready for bed.
Soda kept talking to me and after I kept ignoring him, he finally said, "has this got something to do with your fight with Emily?"
I whipped around and stared at him. "You know about that?"
He nodded. "Em came up to the DX for the last hour of my shift. She comes up a lot while I work just to talk and whatever. You know her and I are close, Pony."
"Did she tell you what we were fighting about?" I asked.
He shook his head. "She didn't really go into details but she seemed pretty upset. What did you say?"
"I don't wanna talk about it," I answered glumly.
He shrugged. "Whatever, man. You know, you really shouldn't be getting yourself in all these situations. You should just focus on girls and cars, works for me."
I rolled my eyes at him. "But I did focus on girls! Well, one girl. And see how that turned out?"
He furrowed his brows. "Cherry?"
I facepalmed. "No, stupid! Emily!"
"Ohhh, right, right, right." He said. "Yeah, you two will work that out."
"No, I'm not speaking to her, ever!" I replied.
"You're a funny guy, Pony. Now turn the light off. We need to get to bed, gotta long day tomorrow what with the rumble and all."
I did as he said and after switching off the lights I climbed into bed with him.
"Soda? Soda, are you up?" I whispered after staring into the darkness for a while.
"Yeah," he whispered.
"Have you... have you ever been in love?"
He flipped over to face me. "...yes." He said after a minute, "remember Sandy? I loved her so much. And I wanted to marry her, but then she..." he trailed off. Sandy was his most recent girlfriend and most serious one. But she suddenly left him with no explanation one day. I remember Soda tried to pretend like he didn't care, but I could see how sad he was about it.
"What's it like?" I asked.
He smiled. "It's real nice."
"How come you've had lots of girlfriends but only ever loved one?" I asked.
He sighed. "It's... complicated. I can't explain why that happens. Maybe it's cause after being with someone for a while, it's easy to see they aren't right for you."
I thought about that for a minute. Emily and I never dated. But lately I kinda have felt differently about her. Maybe I loved her. And maybe now I realized she's not right for me because through this argument I figured out how she really is.
