Epilogue:
“FLETCHER!” a thirty-seven year-old woman with wild hazel eyes and frazzled brown hair called from the kitchen window. “If you drop Fido in the water, I’ll have Daddy throw you in with him!” A little boy with his mother’s hair looked up from the struggling black cat he held over the pool.
“But Tony said that big cats cat swim really well.”
The woman stopped scrubbing the plates and whipped around to glare at her elder son. The teenager’s bright green eyes shone with laughter as he caught his mother’s expression.
“Alright, I’ll go get him.”
Tony went over to the sliding door and whistled for the dog, a mountain of fur hoping to pass as a bean bag in the corner.
“Come on, Guppy. Let’s go get Fletcher.”
The old Saint Bernard opened one eye and grumbled something that sounded like a no. Tony shook his unruly head in disappointment.
“Guess I’m on my own, then. ALL FOR ONE AND ONE FOR ALL!” he roared, valiantly charging out the door and into the backyard.
“Do your job, old man,” the woman laughed at the dog. Guppy looked at her with unenthusiastic eyes but heaved himself to his feet and hobbled out the door after his two young masters, who were in the middle of playing tug-of-war with the cat.
The woman went back to scrubbing the dishes, rolling her eyes at their bellowing shouts and muttering to herself about how they were just like their father.
“And that’s the thanks I get for making dinner every night?” a familiar voice chuckled.
The woman’s vision went dark as two hands covered her eyes.
“You’re back,” she breathed, dropping her sponge and turning around to give her husband a kiss.
“Hey, Liz,” he murmured.
They lips were a hair’s breadth away when they heard a splash in the backyard.
The couple turned around to see a scene of disaster. A thoroughly drenched Fido clung to the top of Tony’s head for dear life. Tony himself was waist deep in the water and trying to wade to shore with Fletcher clinging to his arm like an octopus.
Elizabeth sighed. “Go get them.”
“What’s the harm in a little rough housing?” Vincent laughed. “Loosen up a bit.”
“I’d be a lot more ‘loose’ if you hadn’t insisted on having a second one,” Elizabeth growled, disengaging herself from his arms.
Vincent grabbed her by the waist and towed her back into his embrace.
“How about a third?” he whispered into her ear. “Come on, you might get a girl this time.”
Elizabeth slapped her husband’s hand away and strolled off. The boys pointed at their father in a fit of uncontrollable laughter.
Dinner was the same as usual. Vincent had just started tossing salad when an incessant ringing came from the door. Tony turned off the stove, wiped his hands, and told Fletcher not to touch the fish. No one bothered to wonder who was at the door.
A chorus of giggles floated into the house when Tony finally opened the door.
“Hi, Tony,” crooned some girls from his school. “We made you a cake, see?”
“Thanks,” he smiled as he accepted the artfully wrapped box, “I’m sure it’ll taste great.”
The girls tittered in excitement.
“However,” Tony added in a low murmur, leaning down and pecking a random girl on the cheek, “I bet you’d taste even better.”
The girls continued to swoon even after he closed the door in their faces.
“Pla-yer!” Fletcher whooped as Tony tossed the box into the fridge and went to protect his fish from Fido, who had sneakily perched himself atop the kitchen cabinet.
“Seriously,” Vincent agreed. “I was more popular than that when I was your age, and you never saw me paying the girls any attention. And I thought I told you not to talk to dancers — they’ll think you’re in love with them if you give them special treatment.”
“It’s because of his upbringing,” Elizabeth called from the kitchen table, safely away from the action. Cooking, as she’d discovered in her final year of high school, was not her forte. Nor were sewing, knitting, drawing, and every other womanly tradition.
“How?” Vincent asked in an overly innocent voice.
“Every day since the day he was born, you’ve filled Tony’s head with these ridiculous sentiments that he needs to protect me and look after me and etcetera — that women are these weak little lambs that need constant supervision!”
“Please, all I did was tell him to take care of the people he loved.”
“You’ve raised a misogynistic narcissist who thinks that he’ll never be denied by anyone in the world!”
“Because I won’t,” Tony smirked as he checked his reflection in the window. “Look at me! I’m probably the hottest guy in the state!”
“Careful,” Vincent warned. “One day, some horrid little nerd from hell is going to drag you down and walk all over you, not holding back in the least until you’ve been tortured within an inch of your life.”
“If you’re referring to me—” Elizabeth started.
“Of course not, dear,” Vincent said in a tone that put Fletcher in hysterics.
***
Fletcher snuggled even deeper under the covers as Elizabeth sat on the edge of the bed.
“So — which one tonight?”
“Can you tell me about your honeymoon?”
“Again?” she sighed.
Fletcher watched her with wide eyes. Elizabeth deflated under his stare.
“Fine, fine! Put away the puppy eyes, will you?”
Fletcher giggled.
“Let’s see… Well, your dad and I had just graduated Princeton—”
“—Because he made sure that your application to Harvard was never sent,” Fletcher chipped in, knowing the story by heart.
Elizabeth stared into the distance, wrapped in a heavy cloud of silent wrath.
“Oh, yeah,” she growled. “Believe me, I would have made it in, but that jerk just found a loophole in the reason—”
“—Which was the final reason that stopped him from dating you.”
“So we eventually graduated college together, and not two steps outside the walls, he practically kidnaps me in—”
“—In a helicopter flown by Uncle Rick—”
“—And whisks me off to this island he owned. Your dad gets down on one knee when we land and says—”
“‘Marry me, Liz,’” Fletcher recited, “‘and if you say “not interested” again, I’ll trap you on this island until you say yes.’”
“So I said yes, and we spent our honeymoon snorkeling, eating caviar, and meeting this stork.”
“And inside the stork was Tony,” Fletcher concluded.
“Getting that stork in the first place may have been the best thing that ever happened to me,” Vincent dreamily reminisced in the doorway. “Thin and lacy and soft all over…”
Elizabeth flung a pillow at him.
“Ready to go to sleep?” she asked when Vincent finally fled the room after she’d threatened to chuck the alarm clock.
“Yup.”
Elizabeth took the cue and launched into song.
Vincent waited in the hall, listening to the lullaby he’d written when Elizabeth first discovered that she was pregnant.
My darling, just sleep soundly
And listen to my spell
Remember these life lessons
And yours will turn out well
The first is tough and tricky
But listen to you mom
Accept her loving guidance
And you will not go wrong
The second is to live and
Be open to some change
But don’t forget your studies
Or you shall stay the same
And fourthly, don’t tell gossip
Or it will tell you too
Your friendships are your treasures;
Stay loyal and stay true
Do not allow your rivals
To keep or hold you back
And don’t make friends beneath you
When cleverness they lack
And seventh, just remember:
When gone, I’m near, not far
As long as you still love me
And keep me in your heart
But meanwhile, please refrain from
Condemning those nearby
For while the outside matters
The morals sleep inside
And ninthly, watch your money
Or you will pay the toll
And lastly, make companions;
Don’t hide away your soul
Sweet dreams, my little darling
Of wonders up above
As you slowly fall asleep to
My ten reasons to love.
***************************************************
Yes, I wrote this myself. Heck, I tried! AGGGGHHHH IT'S BEEN SUCH A LONG JOURNEY GUYS!!! THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR STICKING WITH US UNTIL THE END!!!!!!!!!
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10 Reasons Not to Fall in Love
ChickLitElizabeth Blackburn is the perfect young girl...for an action movie. Don't let her pointy spectacles and mismatched socks fool you. This scholarship student will strangle you to death if it means keeping her place at Star Lake Private High. It...
