Chapter Twenty Nine: Lavender Walls

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When I first woke up, I was on one of the couches in the living room in a haze. I could hear voices bouncing off the walls around me, but they were muffled, almost like they were in a room far away from where I was. My body felt so weak that blinking took energy out of me. Everyone spoke in soft voices, but I couldn't tell if that's because they were trying to keep more secrets from me or if they were trying not to disturb me. It felt like there were a stack of stones on top of my chest, causing my breathing to be slow and heavy. I could feel my tight party dress removed from me, but I didn't know what was underneath all of the blankets that covered my body.

"There's my girl," a familiar voice said above the others, but his was clear as day. I tried to focus on the source of the sound, but everything around me was still blurry. I could only see the outlines of the people around me, until I looked to the bottom of the stairs. Leaning on the railing of the stairs was someone I thought was long gone.

My father.

For an entire year, I had only seen pictures of him, but now he looked exactly like he did when he had left with my mother for the office party they were going to the night they both died. He was dressed in a neatly tailored navy suit with a black tie. The suit jacket he wore with it was hanging over his arm. His brow rim glasses framed his face perfectly and the auburn hair on his head matched the hair that was patchy on his jawline.

I tried my best to speak, but no words came out. There were so many things I wanted to say to him, but it was like I had forgotten how to form sentences. Still, he stood there with a beaming smile. Was I dead?

"Not dead, but if I'm here then there's definitely something going on with you," he said with a light chuckle. I could feel my mouth hanging open as my heart pounded against my chest. My father glanced over to the rest of the group, specifically Elliot. Once my father's eyes landed on him, it was like watching a fog part like the Red Sea. Elliot's eyes were serious, but it was clear from how disheveled he was just by how he was slumped in the arm chair that he had moved so he could be next to me. Anyone could tell that he had been sitting there for hours. He was talking to Emmet and Bridget, who looked like they were on their way out.

I glanced back to my father, still trying to find a way to get the words out, but I barely had the energy to open my mouth. My father made his way towards the couch I was resting on. Once he was next to me, he held my hand, which was resting over my abdomen. I noticed that the venom band I had been wearing was now removed and replaced with a blood soaked terry cloth towel. My father bent down and placed a light kiss on my forehead, giving my hand a light squeeze. No one else in the room seemed to notice him standing there in the middle of everything that was going on.

"I know this is confusing and you're scared, but get some rest and we can talk soon," he said. Slowly, my eyelids felt heavier and my breathing became more calm. Before I could drift off into a peaceful sleep, my lips parted.

"Dad," I mumbled.

***

When I woke up again, I was no longer in the old house. I took in a long, deep breath of spring air. My eyes popped open and the bright glow of a setting sun touched the tops of all of the buildings in front of me, including the one I was standing on top of. I quickly backed up into the cream colored wall behind me. I felt that horrifying drop in my stomach as I realized just how high up I was. There was a railing between me and a nasty fall, but my fear of heights kept my back against the chilling stone. Besides the buzzing of the cars, the city was seemingly calm. I looked down at myself and noticed that I was in a wine colored nap dress with short sleeves that fell just above my knees and no shoes covering my feet.

"You know, your mother and I never really understood why you were so afraid of heights," my father's voice said next to me, causing me to flinch back so hard I almost fell over. "Maybe you were on my shoulders and I made a joke about dropping you or something. That sounds like something I would do, right, Caroline?"

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