His Tiny Dancer [COMPLETED]

XLVII

~Saturday, May 14th~

The silence that follows Anne and Melody's departure is some of the worst torture I've ever experienced. Worse than dancing with an open blister. I try to distract myself with my phone, but to no avail. Each time I unlock it I find myself aimlessly scrolling through my home page, no app ever made being capable of distracting me. I lock my phone and return it to my pocket.

I resort to staring at a wall, bouncing my legs, and clenching my hands to the point that my nails dig into the skin on my palm. However, the pain is what grounds me. It's why my hands are clenched like this.

The clock might as well be moving backwards. Four hours feels like a million lifetimes and my nerves and neurotic thoughts only heighten as the time does inevitably pass, inching nearer and nearer to the moment when I might finally get to see him. Not that seeing him will necessarily calm me, though. He could be in worse condition than I expect, sending me into a spiral of guilt and fear that only Noah would be able to save me from, but he's the one who is unwillingly causing it. Even still, I know that I have to see him. I need to. He needs me to.

When sitting in the chair becomes unbearable, I venture to cross the room and fill a small paper cup with water from the bubbler. Taking small sips, I pace across the room, parallel to the plain, empty wall. A strange thought comes to my mind, and I realize that I would never be able to survive in prison due to sheer boredom and lack of things to do. I then realize that I must truly be starting to lose it.

Once it starts to feel like I'll never be called, a nurse walks into the waiting room and finally, finally says my name.

"Teresina White?" It's a different nurse from last time. I stand up from my chair immediately, and feel all of my anxiety increase exponentially as the wait is finally over.

"Yes," I respond and she begins to walk towards me, though I meet her halfway.

"Noah's surgery was completed successfully, he is expected to recover from his abdomen wound just fine." I nearly fall over out of pure relief. He's alright, he's gonna be alright. "You can come see him now," my face lights up and I immediately start bouncing on the balls of my feet in anticipation, "but, he has not regained consciousness. He needs to be watched for a longer period of time, but his doctor believes he is in a coma induced by a head injury. He could also only be unconscious due to shock, but time will tell."

Who knew that a short string of words could cause a dramatic change in emotions so many times. First I'm relieved that his surgery went well, then excited and nervous to get to see him, then heartbroken by the fact that he's still unconscious, and could remain with way for who-knows how long.

"Oh, okay," I say, unsure of how else to respond to that amount of information. "But I can see him?"

"Yes, are you ready?" I nod my head. "Follow me," she says and turns, leading me through the door she entered from.

Oh god, this is it. I finally get to see him.

Am I ready for this? What if he looks worse than I expect?

And I won't even get to talk with him, hear his voice and let him know that I am here with him.

Make him know that he's not alone.

Maybe he'll wake up soon.

But what if he doesn't?

The nurse pauses in front of a door, and my heart nearly beats out of my chest as I realize that he's right there, just one wall between us now.

"I'll give you two some time alone, but I'll be back to check on him in about fifteen minutes. If you need anything or if anything happens before then, there's a help button on the side of his bed. Feel free to press it and myself or one of the other nurses will come." I try hard to listen to the information she's telling me, but I can't stop my gaze from nearly drilling holes in the door separating me and Noah.