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"They should've taken me." Sayah mumbles so quietly Murphy could've missed it if he didn't see her lips move. They had sat in silence for a moment, rain pouring outside. Murphy missed the rain. Only once, he thinks, he had actually felt it on his skin. That seems like years ago.

"Don't say that."

"They should've." She repeats.

"Don't say that!" Murphy tells her. She glances up to meet his eyes. "Don't say that." He repeats lowly. "I'm glad they didn't take you. I don't know what I would've done if—" He pauses and avoids her gaze, focusing on a small pebble at his feet.

   He wishes he could fall asleep and never wake up, and if he did, he wishes he couldn't speak.

"If what, Murphy?" Her voice is soft. Murphy ignores the tightness in his chest. He clears his throat.

"If I had a different guard." He lies. "I'd be dead in seconds, isn't that right?" His eyes look up to see her already looking at him. She's silent for a moment. He wonders what she's thinking. He was right, he would be dead in seconds. She knew that too.

   They both knew of it all, of what they were doing, of what it meant, what it risked. They just didn't know why they were doing it. Young and naive, perhaps? Murphy could've laughed.

"I didn't just threaten everyone to make sure you stayed alive," She suddenly says, her gaze falling to the ground. "I mean, yes, that was the reason but. . ."

Murphy takes this time to look at her. Really look at her. He knew from the second he saw her she was beautiful. Even with the grounder clothes on. A part of him wondered what it was like underneath. He mentally slapped himself. This wasn't another girl at camp.

She definitely wasn't just another girl.

   Murphy wonders if she was thinking about what happened the other night as much as he had been. He had wanted to ask her about her own parents and family but as soon as she wrapped her arms around him, his mind had gone empty.

   Nothing else had mattered in that moment except just them and he couldn't even be mad at himself for it. Murphy questions everything a lot now though. He questions what exactly they were — he was a prisoner; her enemy, right?

   Wrong. Murphy wasn't stupid. He knows she had thought about him as more. If she didn't, then why would she have held him so close to her without question? Murphy refuses to believe it was just 'moral support'. He was pretty sure enemies didn't hold eachother like that. Her people question her strength, but he sees she's strong. He sees she's willing to have peace.

   Young and naive.

"I don't want you dead, Murphy." Sayah admits, looking back up at him. He realises he really liked her eyes. "And I don't want your people dead either." She adds. "Even though, I know you might."

Murphy chuckles at her words. She smiles and puts her head down to hide it. He realises he really likes her smile too.

He wants to thank her for protecting him, but the words don't come out. Young and naive.

"I can't lose Lincoln." She suddenly mumbles. Murphy watches her stare at the ground, gears in her head turning. He bites his lip, looking around and then sighs.

"Come 'ere." He pats a space beside him. Sayah's head turns up to look at him.

"What?" She questions, confused.

"Hurry up before I change my mind." He says.

"Why should I?"

"Okay, well. Great. Now I've changed my mind."

"Hm."

It's silent for a moment. Then Murphy hears the crunch of gravel under feet before feeling an arm brush against his.

"Welcome to the party." He whispers, turning his head ever so slightly.

"What?"

"You're killing me here."

"Quiet, Murphy." She rolls her eyes.

"Uh, you're in my cave, sweetheart."

"'Sweetheart'?"

Murphy feels his cheeks go warm. "Sayah?" He clears his throat.

"Yes?"

"I'm sure Lincoln will be okay."

She doesn't speak after that and Murphy acts oblivious to way she leans into him a little. He hopes she acts oblivious to the way he hesitantly wraps his arms around her like she had done to him previously. But then, Murphy decides that no, he won't ignore the way he really likes them both in that moment. Just them.

   So, so, young and naive. John Murphy is once again reminded of how he's a fool. And how none of his plans really seem to work out.




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a/n

murphy's favourite harry styles song is...
probably falling
LMAO

^ murphy when he called sayah 'sweetheart' and all she did was get even more confused

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^ murphy when he called sayah 'sweetheart' and all she did was get even more confused

^ murphy when he called sayah 'sweetheart' and all she did was get even more confused

Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.

^ sayah to murphy when he wouldn't answer her question

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