Serendipity (Ryeji)

Afraid

The young Hwang was currently in her bed staring at the ceiling, in the same position she's been in for the past—well, who knows. She stopped keeping track after an hour. Last night was crazy for reasons that are better left unsaid. However, her best friend was well on her way to her place already, so Yeji knew a talk was inevitable, probably even against her will if she told her no. Lia wouldn't let this go, not that easy.

Yeji didn't exactly invite her, though. She told Lia what happened after being questioned about the silence and lack of expression she had in the car when she dropped her off at home. At the time, Yeji insisted she'd tell her later. Later ended up turning into this morning, and the reaction she received as a result was expected.

As of now, Yeji despises the thought of Monday rolling around. In fact, she hated the thought so much that she was planning ways to convince her mom she's sick enough to stay home for a day or two. She didn't want to face Yeonjun or Ryujin yet. Not Ryujin because she's afraid of an argument or confirming her feelings. Not Yeonjun because she has a gut feeling the guy might still try to pursue her.

Yeji could've stopped him, but she didn't. He suggested this. He insisted it'd give her confirmation, and she's sure his confidence behind it means he thought it'd end in his favor. But that misled confidence backfires on him in a matter of seconds.

Deep down, she expected this answer. Yeji knew she never had a connection with Yeonjun, not in the way she swoons over a particular Shin, and it's the reason she ends the kiss as soon as it starts. It only felt weird and out of place, wrong and, uhm, awkward...? Yeah, everything about it was just uncomfortable.

Terrified of what this might mean as she quickly pulls away, a tear trickles down her cheek. She doesn't want it to be true, but now that she understands Yeonjun simply left her flustered from time to time, and that there are no romantic feelings involved, she's afraid that the same can't be said about Ryujin.

"Wait." Yeji presses her hands against his chest to ease him back, gently pushing him away from her. "I can't do this."

"I- I'm sorry if I overstepped."

"No, this is my fault. I shouldn't have let you." She sighs, evidently regretful. It's not an expression Yeonjun would like to see. It only fuels his rage toward Ryujin. "But it's more than that. Confused isn't the right term for how I'm feeling and... Actually, I'm not sure why I'm telling you this." Yeji laughs at herself. "You're a great guy, but I'm just not interested, Yeonjun. I'm sorry."

"It's okay. I understand." He takes a step back, shoves his balled fists in his pockets to hide his anger, then clears his throat. She could tell he was upset, and it made her feel guilty for not stopping him sooner.

That guilty feeling still lives on. After all, the events that unfolded occurred last night. She won't lie and say she isn't thankful for the situation, though, considering it pointed out the one thing she didn't want to acknowledge. Perhaps she's never been confused.

'I'm in denial.'

PING!

Her phone pings and the door downstairs opens directly after. Footsteps march up the steps hurriedly, her best friend stomping her way through. "YEJI!" Lia barges into the bedroom. "Why didn't you tell me about this last night??"

"Well hello to you too."

"Haha, very funny. Answer the question."

"The answer is simple. I didn't want to talk about it yet." Yeji groans and sits up against the headboard of her bed. "Actually, I don't want to even now. It's not exactly a thrilling topic for me."