Humanity Endures

Part 8 - Preparations | Chapter 2

Languishing within her personal quarters, Farlina, defeatedly curled up by the base of her bed, found her heart as divided as the galaxy. Before, when she had fought for the Empire, she had known no conflict between her side's aims and those of the enemies she battled; her enemies were a genocidal alien species, so there was nothing to be conflicted about. This had changed in the terrible moment when Farlina's home space station, one of the countless orbiting and exploiting uninhabited worlds across the cosmos, had willingly joined Heralax's side. Indeed, having reviewed the "Traitors'" manifesto a number of times, Farlina found herself drawn to much of it — how could she disagree with a cause which promised her and her people greater political representation? The lack of power that space stations had within the Empire, despite their vast combined population, had been one of Farlina's only issues with the nation she served — now, there was an Imperator promising to right these wrongs, and she fought against him. How could she do such a thing? At the same time, Farlina was a member of the Ruthless's crew, and a loyal officer of Xertaza, whom she believed to be one of the finest prime constables to ever exist; if Heralax won the war, Xertaza would almost certainly be executed, and not only would that be a terrible blow to the war against the aliens, but it would be a tragic death of a fine woman — of Farlina's friend. Tearing at her hair and cursing her situation vigorously, Farlina could not help but feel torn between her home, her ship, her people, her commander, and her desire to do the right thing, whatever the hell that was. The desperate times suffered no moral certainty to live, and Farlina, torn between two righteous causes, had to decide whether to fight her own people for Xertaza, or to betray the only true friends she had left for the sake of a cause she believed in and a home she loved. It was impossible to make a correct decision under the circumstances, and there were countless other people across the galaxy, confronted with the same terrible choice, in that very moment.

Farlina had been there for hours, trapped within her once comforting quarters, which now only whispered of doubt, treason, betrayal, and their consequences. Her uniform was simultaneously stained with desperate tears and fearful sweat as she weighed entire sections of her life against each other, trying to come to a conclusion in the most damning quandary she had ever faced. Farlina, usually one for swift, sometimes reckless action, had for once found herself utterly paralyzed. Her eyes desperately scanned the walls of her chamber, searching for something that might tip the scales of her mental battle, yet they found only more uncertainty — a conflict within cannot be resolved by forces external. Sighing wearily, Farlina then turned her gaze to her heart.

What was she fighting for? Farlina found the answer — that she was fighting both for her friends on the Ruthless, and for the people of the galaxy — to be as vague and divided as the rest of her thoughts: she quickly ceased this previous approach. Where emotions had failed to provide clarity, she could always rely upon cold logic; dosing herself with a modicum of MECS, Farlina began to reason her way through both the galaxy-wide conflict, and her own internal battle. A few minutes passed, and Farlina finally began to understand more: the personal cost of betraying her friends was substantial, and her benefit to Heralax's cause, if she were to join it, would be relatively minor. Alternatively, even if she were to stay with Lassarha's side, Farlina would hardly turn the tide of the war, yet she would not have betrayed her friends, and she could still switch sides later if Heralax's victory became imminent — by staying with Xertaza and Lassarha, Farlina kept her options open, and ensured that she would not be executed for treason in the near future. Furthermore, as she was but an engineer, there was no chance of her actually having to take up arms against her own people, for she was primarily designing weapons for use against the aliens, or seeing to the maintenance of a warship that others used in battle — Farlina's dilemma was less terrible than what many people were confronted with. Having finally found emotional clarity in the realm of objective logic, and deciding that she was a member of Xertaza's crew first and a revolutionary second, Farlina, overwhelmed with the liberating sensation of certitude, stood up, and resolved to go design something for use in the Alien War. Through such acts, she did not help any one side, but instead helped humanity as a whole, and that was what she believed in.