31: blog post (3)
something different
October 14
Something Different... to be or not to be?
By: Mae Jakobs
Hey, guys. It's Mae again. This is not an update on the update about the update; this is something different.
Recently I've been trying to connect with my creative side, so I think I'm going to try something new. If you guys absolutely despise it, I'll throw the idea out, but I figured I'd at least try.
I want to challenge myself to make a post once a week (in addition to my weekly post) that has to do with something creative. That could range from me grinding out some really bad poetry, writing short stories, or maybe even posting some photos I've edited? I even thought about posting some story ideas/prompts and having small little competitions between you all?? I think it could be fun!
Knowing there's a possibility you guys won't love this concept, I'm gonna crank out all my creativity and leave you all with some really bad poetry. Don't take it too seriously, okay? I'll review each individual poem after I post it... you'll see what I mean.
loneliness
he takes two steps
then another;
the single step
is somehow a step backwards
she takes a deep breath
then another;
the second breath
makes breathing even harder
they take a bow
and then another;
the second bow
makes the crowd roar louder
it's the loneliness
of our actions
that cause them to feel
like defeats
take a step back
take a deeper breath;
evaluate the chaos
and push forward
—This was just a starter, I don't have much of a reason for writing it. It's one of those things you write and you're like, "oh my god !! I sound kind of cool?? Am I good at this??" But after reading it a couple times, you've lost the confidence and you remain normal and not-so-good at poetry.
a smile of hope
the way i smile
when he smiles
makes me wonder
how i smiled
without his smile
in the first place.
his smile
reminds me of her smile;
it is constant
and radiating.
even when it's sad,
it is hopeful.
her smile was perfection;
it never faltered,
even during storms
or miscommunication.
she knew that
everything would be okay.
sometimes i wonder
how i will survive
without that hopeful smile;
but i think that he
has brought the hope
back to my own.
—Writing poems about real life people is scary. It's scary to allow yourself to document real, candid feelings. I wonder what I'll think of this poem in a year from now. I wonder where I'll be a year from now... I wonder what my smile will be like a year from now. A certain boy has had me feeling good about things lately... he makes me motivated to connect to things that I've tried to distance myself from out of fear and discouragement. He reminds me of my mom in that way; she never wanted me to give up on things just because I was unsure, or hesitant. Something about the lightness of his being corresponds with what I always thought my mom to be. I don't feel reliant on him or his light, but instead I feel more confident in knowing that he's brought something back to me after all this time.
