No Strings Attached

-8-

"I told you I'm okay." Eleanor chuckled.

"Chance baby, I heard you the first time. Bakit kailangang defensive?" I scoffed and rolled my eyes.

"Iba ka kasi makangiti."

"What's with my smile?" Tanong niya at mas lalo pang nilaparan ang ngiti. Nakakaloko.

"Don't talk to me." Tinalikuran ko siya pero tumakbo siya sa harap ko para harangan ako.

"Eleanor don't be stubborn." I furrowed my eyebrows.

"You should let loose, babe. Tara!" Bago pa ako makapag-react, nahila na niya ako pabalik ng living room.

"Uhm, guys may pupuntahan lang kami. We'll be back!" Paalam niya without waiting for their reply. Hinila na niya ako pabalik sa kotse at sumakay. Siya na din ang nagdrive papunta sa kung saanman.

Moments later, I grimaced when I realized that she just brought me to Enchanted Kingdom. Ano bang akala niya sakin, bata? That won't solve my problem.

"Seriously, Eleanor?!" I kept myself from raising my voice. Tinawanan lang niya ako at hinila papasok at umorder ng tickets. Siya na din ang nagbayad.

"Eleanor, ano bang ginagawa mo?" I spoke habang hila-hila niya ako. She dragged me to Rio Grade Rapids.

"Just let it loose, Chance. Scream all you want." She laughed even when nothing's funny. Ano ba ang nakakatawa? Na miserable ako ngayon? Na kailangan kong ipilit na magmukhang okay? Na pati sarili ko lolokohin ko kahit alam ko ang totoo?

Sumakay na kaming dalawa and my mood's not getting any better. Napansin ko pa ang tingin nung mga staff dun but I didn't care. I don't give a damn.

Nakasimangot lang ako all throughout the ride. Eleanor kept on nudging me to smile or do anything other than pull a smug look on my face.

Natapos yung ride at nabasa lang naman ako. We went outside then Eleanor smacked my arm. I stared at her, my jaw clenched while trying to control my temper.

"Chance naman! Hindi ka man lang ba makangiti? Give yourself a chance! Bakit ba ang bitter mo?" She demanded. At ngayon siya pa ang galit? I gritted my teeth. How can she be so... immature?

"Why is it big deal for you anyway?" I glared at her pero sinamaan niya lang din ako ng tingin.

"Kapag lagi kang nakasimangot, mas bibigat yang dinadala mo!" She placed her both hands in either side of her waist.

"Eleanor, can you stop that?!" Tumaas na ng tuluyan ang boses ko.

"If you think that bringing me in a fucking child's place can enlighten me, then you're badly mistaken. Look, kung anuman yung ginagawa mo, thanks but I don't think I need that. Bakit ba pinipilit mo akong ngumiti eh hindi na nga ako makangiti ng totoo? Ano bang mas gusto mo? Lokohin ko ang sarili ko? Fine, maybe I lied. I'm not okay. Matagal na akong hindi okay! Pero buhay pa din naman ako kahit hindi ako ngumiti. I won't choke myself if I don't act so bitter around so Eleanor please grow up! May mas importante pa naman sa pagngiti! Life goes on even when your bride leaves you on the altar or a girl leaves you for your twin brother or when I don't smile! Ano bang hindi mo maintindihan dun?" I continued. My breathing was uneven. Nakatingin lang sakin si Eleanor after I spoke. Magkatinginan lang kami and nobody spoke. Inaantay ko lang naman na siya yung magsalita because Eleanor is one to always have a witty reply.

"Sorry," I was taken aback with her word. I blinked twice before studying her. She looked sincere and serious. Nakatingin lang ako sa kanya dahil hindi ko naman alam kung anong sasabihin ko. Bakit feeling ko dapat ako yung magsorry?

I avoided her gaze as I ran a hand through my hair, "Eleanor, I'm..."

"Sorry Chance." She gave me a small tight-lipped smile. She had this expression on her face as if I just hit some nerve. As if I did hurt her.

"Eleanor..."

"Let's go." She held my hand at hinila ako palabas ng amusement park. Wait, aalis na kami? Her one hand was holding mine while the other one was busy with her phone. Hindi ako makaimik dahil hindi ko alam ang sasabihin.

Bakit parang ako pa yung nakagawa ng mali? I just explained things pero parang nasaktan ko si Eleanor. Maybe I shouldn't have lose my temper. I shouldn't have yelled at her.

She's just trying to help me tapos siya pa ang napasama. You're such an asshole, Chance. Kaya siguro iniiwan ka ng mga babae mo.

Tahimik lang siya kahit habang nagdadrive kaya mas lalo akong nailang. Eleanor is unusually silent―very silent na talagang wala siyang sinasabi. Sanay naman ako noon sa katahimikan dahil madalas na akong mag-isa pero iba yung silence ngayon. It must be true that there are different types of silence but I hate this type, I guess.

Nakakabingi.

I'm dying to talk about nonsense just to break it. I clenched my fist. How can this be so deafening?

Please naman magsalita ka.

"Sorry." She said again. I almost heaved a sigh.

"I heard you the first time, Eleanor."

"No, I really am sorry. For bothering you. For making you lose your temper. For pestering you and stuff like that. For bringing you to an amusement park. I mean, who in the right mind would do that?" She laughed nervously. "I'm so childish and immature. I'm sorry. Uhm, magtitino na po ako promise." She gave me a smile bago bumaling ulit sa daan pero some part of me knows she doesn't mean that smile.

"Eleanor..." Bigla akong natahimik nung tumigil ang sasakyan.

"Andito na tayo. Tulungan mo na sila magprepare ng wedding. My dad texted me eh. May gagawin pa ako." She patted my shoulder kaya napatingin lang ako sa labas ng bahay namin.

"Eleanor, are you okay?" Bigla naman siyang tumawa. She was nervous.

"Of course, I'm okay. Go na Chance baby. Okay lang ako." I know she's not pero parang nawalan ako ng karapatang magsalita pa ulit. Parang wala akong karapatang magtanong because I just pushed her away.

I heaved a sigh. Bumaba na ako and she immediately drove away. Mag-isa na lang tuloy akong bumalik sa bahay. Fier had this ridiculous look on her face.

"What?" I asked, irritated. Sinamaan niya lang ako ng tingin before placing her hands on her hips.

"Anong what? Where's Kai?" She asked, mukhang naguguluhan.

Napaiwas ako ng tingin. "She had things to do."

"Ikaw ha? Baka kung ano nang ginawa mo dun. Dun ka na sa loob. Akala ni Monique, umalis ka na ng tuluyan." She gave me one last glare and a roll-eye before heading back to the living area. Napabuntong hininga na lang ako at sumunod kay Fier.