Moonchild | KNJ & Reader

When My Heart Stopped By the River Han

Your POV

"Where the hell are you Y/N?!", Namjoon called me. 

A pain that started in the left side of my chest was spreading rapidly like a wildfire, paralysing me. Instead, I curled up into a tight ball on the floor, praying that he'd somehow find me in this chaos. Bang! Screams. Running. Pain. I tried gathering my thoughts to work out where I was and what was happening but the only sensation I could feel was the pain. My thoughts kept running back to the past instead of focusing on the present.

***

"Morning! How's life?", Namjoon's honey-soaked voice greeted me as I plopped myself on to the passenger seat next to his. He briefly took off his mask and kissed me lightly on the forehead before sliding it back on.

"Morning to you too sun shine. Life's great. Partially because I'm with you but mainly because I have no homework on a Sunday.", I joked.

His arms crept around my waist and he buried his face in to my neck, "Great too.", he mumbled just audibly.

***

Before I could tell what was happening, arms entwined themselves around me and cradled me. I don't think I've ever felt so safe apart from when I was in my mother's arms as a baby.

"You'll be safe moon child.", Namjoon's raspy voice reassured.

 I wanted to believe him but I knew I couldn't. The memories were slowly recollecting and I could remember slightly what happened. How could I be okay if there's a bloody bullet millimetres away from my heart and no help in sight? Where on earth are the emergency services when you need them? Then my mind drifted back in to the past.

***

"Well, I've kind of finished all the work I have early and I have all of tomorrow free. I was thinking of taking you out."

"Why? Is hanging out at my apartment too low for you?"

"God sake Y/N. I don't mean it like that."

"Just kidding! I didn't know you get wound up so quick."

***

I kept my eyes closed and bathed in those happy moments of life. Anything to try and avoid the horrible present reality. If only I could be back in my bedroom where I was yesterday, texting Namjoon and joking around to annoy him.

"Y/N? I'm calling an ambulance.", Namjoon announced, slowly releasing his cradled arms from around me.

"No. Please don't. I'm actually okay.", I pleaded.

"You're not okay. It hurts to say this aloud but you're not okay."

"Please.", I tugged at his once white but now blood-stained shirt, "Don't leave me."

***

After venting my anger out at Joonie, I feel a thousand times lighter than before. I was afraid he wouldn't get me but I guess I was wrong. And he's right. It's not the end of the world I didn't pass these tests. I tried and I'm guessing (according to Namjoon's philosophy) that's all that matters. I look around my small flat. Oh god! I officially have fifteen minutes now to tidy up all the mess that's been gathering in the house over the past week. Where do I start? The pile of paper, the dishes in the sink, do I vacuum the carpet? You know what, I don't care. I plop myself down on to the sofa and turn on the TV. Fifteen minutes later, I hear a crash followed by a doorbell.

***

It would be helpful if I didn't keep phasing out like that and going back into the past! Whilst I phased out, Namjoon had left me but I could hear his voice somewhere in the distance. Close enough to hear him blaring in to his phone but too far away to make out exactly what he was saying. Why the hell do you not get me now? Don't you understand that I don't want you to leave me? My head throbs and so does my hurt. there's a horrible pain somewhere near my centre and I writhe around on the floor desperately.