The Telmarine Wife

Chapter 25

Chapter 25

Narnia, year 1014

Meri was poised, elegant, and beautiful as she moved around the ballroom. Her tiara of silver and gold woven together, a perfect blend of the two, sat on her long plaited hair. Her gown was of the purest white that fit at the bodice and had a slight flare at the waist. Lena watched from the side of the room as Meri mingled with the guests. She was kind and courteous to each one and she smiled and laughed with ease. The role of Crown Princess seemed to fit her well. Lena found it hard to believe that just that morning, Meri was ready to back out of the whole thing.

"What if I make a mistake?"

"Oh, you will, and probably many of them."

"Wow, Mamma. Thanks for the confidence boost."

"We all make mistakes, Meri; it's a part of life. They are vital. They help us grow. It is how you respond to the mistakes that matters. Trust me, Meri; I've made many mistakes in my life."

"Like what?"

"Do you remember a few weeks ago when I tried to end things with Edmund before they ever began?"

"That doesn't count. That was a foolish notion on your part and you didn't go through with it; if anything it is only a near mistake."

"I only didn't go through with it because somebody schemed to get me and Edmund alone."

"Nalsa and I did what we had to do. Try again."

"Alright, what about the day I left him in London?"

"What day?"

"It was before you met him. After I'd finished my work with the S.I.S. I tried to leave him. I tried to warn him that he deserved someone better than me, and I walked away from him."

"What happened, because it obviously didn't stick either?"

"He... He came running after me. He chased me down in the street and kissed me for all the world to see; it was rather indecent of us. Public displays like that are..."

"Romantic, Mamma. They're romantic. I didn't know Babbo ran after you."

"He did. I was so thrown off balance by him that I was weak and couldn't say no again."

"Did you want to say no again?"

"I didn't want to say no the first time. I was just trying to do what was best for him."

"You're what's best for him, Mamma. And that incident doesn't count either. It's another near mistake since, fortunately, Babbo had enough sense to go after you. You're two for two."

"Fine. What about the day I left you then?"

"Me?"

"Leaving you in Sicily with Caterina... It was the biggest mistake I've ever made."

"No. No you didn't leave, Mamma. You went away to work for a few years, but you came back."

"A few years? Seven years, Meri. I left for seven years, and when I left... I had no intention of ever returning."

"No. No." Meri shook her head in protest. "But you sent me presents. You wrote to me, told me you were coming home soon."

"I sent those things and I said those things because I didn't know how to tell you I wasn't coming back. You were always on my mind, but I didn't know how to be a mother to you. I didn't know how to love you. I didn't know how to love anyone then. You were two when I left and nine when I returned."