Curious

IV

"Just listen for a moment," Jesy tells her. "Basically, it's no one's business. Some people are very open about their boob size, and some people are very private about it. And people can ask, and make assumptions based on what they think they know, but like I said, it's no one's business. You don't own any answers to anyone. Just live your life, okay?"

"I'm twenty two, this is going to come out of nowhere if I announce that I have a girlfriend one day, " Jade insists.

"Some people only come to terms with their sexuality when they're old enough to worry about not waking up the next morning. You're not too old to figure yourself out."

"Well, most people figure themselves out in middle school," Jade argues. She doesn't mean to make things hard for Jesy, but that's just the way she feels. It's almost as though she has lived a lie for her entire life. "Why did I not see this sooner? This is so, so unfair. If I would've figured it out earlier, things were so much easier."

"You don't know that," Jesy says. "And,like I said, no one is wrong or right about the way, and the timing, they approach their sexuality. The fact that you didn't see it in middle school doesn't make it any less real. Be glad you've come to terms with this and move on. I promise it's going to be okay."

"Okay," Jade agrees after a long period of silence. She is feeling so many different emotions she is unable to sense any of them. It's like she's been through such an intense experience that reality seems to pause.

"Now go talk to Perrie," Jesy encourages Jade with a teasing, yet loving, smile.

"What? No," Jade immediately replies. She hurt Perrie, she is quite sure of that. Perrie probably doesn't want to see her right now.

"Jade, you could sit here and continue to stress yourself out about your sexuality, or you can do what you want to do and tell her how much you like her. All I'm saying is that one option is going to make you feel bad, while the other is going to possibly make today of the best days of your life. Your choice," Jesy says.

"Thanks Jes. I love you," Jade tells Jesy and gets up before hugging her.

"Love you too. Update me on how it goes," Jesy calls after Jade as she swiftly makes her way to Perrie's dorm. She knocks, and waits, and knocks again, because she has something important to say. And finally, Perrie opens up, and Jade cannot deny how beautiful she is. All Jade can think of is badly she wants to kiss her.

"I'm sorry about yesterday night," she begins.

"It's okay," Perrie replies with a shy smile.

"I'm just a nervous person in general, and I worry a lot, so I panicked. But it had nothing to do with you, I promise."

"I understand that," Perrie softly answers.

"I actually think that I like you. A lot," Jade continues.

For a moment, nothing happens, and Jade is sure she had messed everything up. But then Perrie leans in closer, and finally, places her lips on Jade's. It's new, and so much more fun than what Jade is used to, and for a moment, Jade forgets all about how nervous she is. Because before Perrie is a woman, she is Perrie. And Jade might like girls, but she doesn't like every girl out there. She likes Perrie.

For the next months, they take things slow. Whenever Jade decides what they get to do, they stay in and watch a movie with absolutely zero space in between them. When Perrie has the right to choose, she takes Jade out to bars, and cafés, and every place she likes in her hometown.

Jade feels a sense of security wherever she goes. Knowing that there is one person who loves her for who she is, someone that is choosing to be with her, and only with her, because they want to, is the most fulfilling feeling ever. Things that remind her of Perrie make her happy. Seeing her makes her whole day.

She follows Perrie wherever she goes. Her mind is constantly asking about Perrie. The things that Perrie likes become Jade's greatest passions, for no real reason but the fact that Perrie likes them. Her whole attitude changes. For the first time in a long time, she looks forward to every day as she wakes up in the morning.

Jade loves London.

°°°

A/n: If you have made it to the ending of this story, thank you. I hope you enjoyed❤️

Like I said, this story is very very personal for me. I started writing it during one of the most confusing times of my life, and four chapters later, I have one thing to say yall: I am bisexual.

It still feels weird directly admitting it. Writing this story felt very silly at times. Jade obviously likes girls, yet it takes her so long to come to terms with her sexuality. These were all thoughts that were going through my head (and still are) as I wrote this story. I hope it made some of you gorgey huns feel a little more understood.

I'd like to thank you all for reading. It seriously means a lot💕 and lastly, I'd like to thank one pure angel on this earth, you know who you are. None of this would have happened without you. I love you❤️