Why are kids emo? lemme show you (Aka Rant Book)

47- literally ignore this

you cant seem to read titles, but this is literally to my cousin, so fuck off, unless youre ash

~~~

i know everyone says its not my fault, you told me it would never be my fault, but i cant help but feel as if it was

that i was the reason you gave up

ash, you were the one person who really understood me, who knew my brain, better than anyone else

we werent so different, you and i, we both has the same troubles

we were the ones there for each other, you were the first person irl i told, you got me into green day, expanded my emo, helped me explore the lgbt community, all these sweet memories

when we played famous last words and i tried to be gerard and you were frank, how you almost  poked my eye out with your guitar, i will never hear famous last words the same, you made this fun, please, ill be your mikey to your gerard

when we would stay up till 4 am just texting

thats how we both came out, i told you i felt like a guy and you told me that you didnt feel gender, nonbinary

i remember it, that was almost 3 months ago

ash, you were seriously the best cousin to me, please, please, please, please, please, please dont die

we have our things and if that isnt enough, just know, its enough for me and i wanna make it enough for you no matter what

i still have your wooden block from christmas, and some days, it keeps me going and not wanting to die and it keeps my anxiety down

ever since misty texted me about you i couldnt help but feel as if i didnt do enough, maybe i shouldve thought more into your gift than just a damn rainbow guitar strap or the headphones that i put mcr logos on

i love you so damn much, dont die on us, we may be the misfits of the family, but we are misfits together, and this may sound selfish, but dont make me a lonely misfit, the fun thing about being a misfit is being one with you

i know you said you didnt like that i posted a lot, and you dont even know of my wattpad, but i really dont want you gone, please

please, you always wanted to meet gerard way or billie joe armstrong, thats very possible still, mcr is back, i remember how excited you were, and how we planned hellamegatour

just, please, dont be afraid to walk this world alone, because you wont be alone

ill be with you as long as i can

- from your cousin, and fellow family outcast, billie 💜🖤