"I have to tell Eliza's parents," Brody said.

"I'll go with you," Nixon offered as they left the house.

I sat on my bed in my gear. I reached into my pocket and pulled out the engagement ring I bought for Eliza. I stared at it. We went through hell and were in the right place. Why did this happen?

A few days after the fire, I stood in my bedroom. I finished tying my tie when Pops knocked on my door. I looked at him.

"Ready?" Pops asked me.

"No, but I don't get a choice," I answered.

Pops looked at me as I walked past him and down the stairs. Everyone was waiting for me. I didn't want comfort; I wanted to get through this damn funeral. We got into our cars and drove to the cemetery.

I sat in the back seat, staring out of the window. My parents said nothing. Since that night, I didn't say much. Different family members tried to talk to me, but I didn't want to discuss it. I know my family wants to help, but it's not like Eliza died from suicide, a car accident, or a plane crash. She died on the job. We knew the risks of the situation.

We pulled into the cemetery and parked. I got out of the vehicle and buttoned my suit coat, then walked towards the casket. I hugged Eliza's parents because I knew they needed comfort.

I found my seat and sat down as others found their seats. I sat in between my parents while my brothers sat behind us. Aunt Luna and Uncle Nolan sat in the row with my parents and me. Uncle Nixon performed the funeral.

"We gather today to say goodbye to Eliza Shields, a young woman that loved life and people. Most people misunderstood Eliza because they assumed things about her, but she loved everything she had in her. Eliza chose the paramedic field because she wanted to help people, the way Presley helped her," Nixon said.

I sat there and listened.

"What can you say about loss? You can't. When someone passes, you mourn the person. Grief consumes you, and it takes people who love you to pull you from the devastation and heartbreak. Grief is the storm of life, and love is the rainbow after the storm. Death is not the end, but the beginning. As we say goodbye to a daughter, a girlfriend, a friend, and a paramedic, let's remember what Eliza loved and remember her. Please join us in celebrating Eliza's life," Nixon finished.

I heard cries and looked at the casket as people got up and placed a flower on it. The fire department, along with paramedics and police, saluted Eliza. The first responders are family, and when one dies, everyone suffers the loss.

I stood up and reached into my pocket, pulling out the ring. I walked over to the casket as everyone watched me and placed the ring on Eliza's coffin. That shocked my parents and Eliza's parents, but not my brothers. My brothers stood there somberly, watching me as I walked away.

"Did you know about that?" Pops asked Ma.

"No," Ma answered, shaking her head.

Uncle Cayson walked over to the lieutenant.

"Hey, Cayson," the lieutenant greeted Uncle Cayson.

"Hey, Buck," Cayson said.

"I'm sorry for Gray's loss. The entire department sends their condolences," Buck said.

"Thank you, but get Presley back on the job ASAP. The longer Presley's off the job, he won't return, and people need him," Cayson reasoned.

"I made a call to Kevin Hayes. Presley will station in his unit. I explained the situation. He knows how important it is to get back on the job, plus Gray trained at his station," Buck explained.

"Dom told me that even if I lose a life, I saved others. There were times I wanted to quit," Cayson said.

"It's a life of a paramedic. We can't save everyone," Buck reasoned.

I went back to the car. Ma and Pops got inside the vehicle, and we went back to the house. My parents invited everyone back to the house to eat. I didn't want to eat or talk to people. All I wanted is the person in the casket.

Life is a bitch.

I stood out in the backyard with my tie loosened, without my suit coat. People offered their condolences to me as I stood there. I nodded, saying nothing. What do people want me to say? Thank you for your sympathy.

Ma walked over to me. "Did you want anything to eat?" She asked.

"I'm not hungry," I mumbled.

"Okay, let me know when you want to eat," Ma said, offering comfort.

I nodded. Ma walked away as I moved from my spot and away from people. I walked over to the rose garden in the backyard and stared at it.

"It sucks, doesn't it?" Someone said.

I looked and saw Matthew standing next to me.

"Yeah," I answered, looking back at the roses.

We stood there silently. I didn't want to talk or be here now. I wanted to celebrate my engagement. I heard someone scream and turned. Matthew and I watched Eliza's mom lose it as Eliza's dad and others consoled her.

"I can't watch this," I mumbled, walking away and into the house. I know people think it's a dick move, but I can't watch Eliza's parents mourn when I'm hurting.

I stood at the sink, placing my hands on the countertop. I stared down, trying to catch my breath.

"You okay, Presley?" Payton asked.

"No," I answered.

"Do you need anything?" Payton asked.

I looked at my brothers. "Yeah," I answered.

"What do you need?" Parker asked.

"For everyone to leave me the hell alone," I replied, walking away.

My brothers looked at each other. I didn't want my brothers' help. They cause issues between Eliza and me. Plus, it's not like they care. Growing up, my brothers pounced on me. So why would I ask for their help?

Payton acts holier than thou. Parker makes comments. Patton and Paxton find any reason to jump on me. Why the hell would I want their help? Plus, they put Eliza in harm's way, which I'm still pissed at them.

I went up to my room and entered, then let my anger fly. I pushed stuff off my dresser as I trashed my room. I picked up a picture frame with Eliza's picture and threw it against the wall, smashing the glass.

"Presley!" I heard Pops yell as I unleashed my anger.

It took Pops and Nolan to subdue me, then I broke. I sobbed in their arms. I buried my head into Pops's chest as I gripped his shirt. I cried as my family watched me.

Grief is a funny thing. You feel as if your drowning in a sea of emotions. You can't breathe. You pray someone throws you a life preserver and saves you. No one can save me from this situation.

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