The Kingfisher

XXV : Ailyn

Salo had gotten his answer. The light quirk of his lips vanished. "So that's it. He is it." He thrust his hands in the air and hauled them back down almost immediately, as if he didn't know what the correct way to react was. "I don't understand. After everything he has done to you? Look at yourself! You are a wreck!"

Ailyn swallowed, the muscles of her throat tensing. "He did it because he knew it would not kill me."

"He did it because he knew it would!"

"But it didn't," retorted the princess, and as she inhaled sharply her chest convulsed with the promise of a sob. Don't you dare cry now.

Salo cringed at the sound, and his features softened. His eyes darted to the floor as he gnawed on the flesh behind his lips for a split second. He's anxious, Ailyn realized, bringing up a trembling hand to rub her forehead. And it's my fault. "How?" he breathed, low enough to camouflage the tremor of his voice. "After he has pursued you, attacked you, planted darkness in your soul for all that's holy, how do you still prefer him?"

Ailyn's gaze snapped up, catching Salo's narrowed glance. It wasn't soured like one would expect. It was somber. Wistful, remembering some easier times. As much as she wanted to reply, to declare he was wrong in his face and offer him the relief he deserved, all that came from her ajar lips were forced breaths grazing her throat.

Salo gathered his lips, nodding gently as he finally faced the girl. "You need to learn the difference between forgiveness and affection, Ailyn. One you ask for, and the other you earn." His gaze returned to the blurry glass. "It's not wrong to forgive your enemy. But love him? Yes."

The room fell silent. Ailyn's dry lips were opening and closing, like a fish desperately gasping for air. The thick quiet stretched to engulf them in a blanket of stillness, which conjured chills instead of warmth. He's right, a little voice in her head squeaked, but she smothered it before it could mock her any further. She knew, of course she did. Somehow, after everything he had done, Ailyn still wanted the best for Kage. She wanted for him to be okay. She still cared, undoubtedly.

But Salo was mistaken about one thing, and she had been wrong too; Ailyn did not love Kage. Perhaps love was the closest thing to what she was experiencing, but she felt none for the prince. Because forgiveness demanded acknowledgment of all the horrible crimes he had committed.

After the last days, she had realized; Kage was not a man she could ever truly cherish.

Ailyn examined the boy beside the window. He had abandoned all efforts, gazing at the miles upon miles of greenery outside. He had helped Ailyn, protected and defended her, saved her life even. And all he was getting in return was some petty replies and a glower.

The princess sighed as the wrinkles on her face slackened. She had to explain. She had to reassure him there was no bias or preference in her mind, and if there was, it was in Salo's favor.

I must admit what I have been denying. For his sake.

The girl shut her eyes, little drops of sweat trickling down her temple despite the freezing atmosphere. "Salo, I need to tell--"

An abrupt series of yells interrupted her, followed by a single gunshot.

Slowly, Ailyn rose from her seat. More screams. Another gunshot. Her eyes grew and grew until they were round crystal balls ogling at the doors just a few feet away from her. Oh no. Her ears twitched at the sound of hammering steps down the hallway on the other side.

"Ailyn," Salo's shaky voice called warningly, snapping the girl out of her horror. She swirled her head around to face a disturbed boy ready to smash out of the window if he needed to.