We Will Shine {Book 6 in the Star of Gryffindor Series}

Chapter 45 - Fred Weasley's Girlfriend

I blinked at her. "You don't?"

"I mean, I don't know." She was avoiding my eyes again. "I don't fail at things, Astra. I keep trying until I get it right. But I don't fail. I'm not a failure."

"This doesn't make you a failure," I said quickly. "Just—"

"Yes, it does!" She finally looked up at me. "I'm trying as hard as I can and it's doing nothing."

"That's okay, Colette—"

"It's not." She shook her head. "You wouldn't get it; you're okay with failing at things. I'm not. I can't be."

I wasn't sure if that was an insult or not, but I decided to ignore it. "This isn't the type of thing that trying harder will help you in," I said instead, standing up and walking closer to her. "Most of the things you do are all processes and logic and clear steps, even if they're hard steps. And you keep working until you get it, which works because those are skills you can learn. But this is about your emotions, Colette. It's a lot harder to sort through those."

Colette glanced from me to the chest, then back at me. She looked lost. Not lost as in she wasn't following what I was saying, but lost as in a kid who gets separated from their parents on a train platform. There's people moving all around, but they're all so much taller. It's a whole different world down there, amidst swishing coats and boots and everyone going far too fast. Everything is so jumbled and confused and the kid has no idea what's going on or where to turn or who to ask for help.

"I don't know how to do that," she said softly. "Sort through it."

I smiled a little. "Join the club." Then my smile faded. "Do you want to talk about it?"

She shook her head. "I... It was awful. I don't even know how to talk about it, even if I wanted to."

"That's okay." I patted her shoulder, and she raised an eyebrow at me but didn't pull away. "You don't have to know how right now. But when you do, I think it would help. I mean, it helps Wren, doesn't it?"

"I guess so. I'm not Wren."

"I know you're not. I know you've been bottling up your emotions your whole life, and she hasn't." She opened her mouth, and I cut her off. "Yes, I know, it's survival instincts, a coping mechanism, whatever you want to call it. You've had a shit life. I actually, really, do get it. You think I was having a lot of heart to hearts with the Lewises before I came here?"

I paused for an answer, fully aware that I was being slightly dramatic. Colette rolled her eyes and shook her head, but she was smiling faintly. Content, I continued, "I think if I'd tried, they'd have locked me in the basement until I stopped. So I get it. I never talked to anyone about anything before I came here and met Wren and the Potters.

"And then Wren left, and it would've been so easy to shut myself off from everyone. I wanted to. To protect myself. Survival instincts, right? But I didn't do that, because Albus and James were here, and they didn't let me. And I'm so glad they didn't, honestly, because even if I could have handled all that on my own, I didn't want to."

I pursed my lips. I'd lost my point in there somewhere. "Basically, um, you don't have to handle this alone, I guess. We're here for you. I am, for sure, and I know Wren and Al and even James are, too."

Colette was frowning at me. "I don't need anyone."

"No, you don't," I said, though I had my doubts about that. "But we're here anyway."

Her eyes had grown distant. That wasn't what I had expected. She blinked, then blinked again, like she was holding back tears. Maybe she was. She took a deep breath. "But you weren't."