Dark Side |COMPLETED|

Chapter Nineteen

It's been seven months and school had finally let out for break. Grayson and Lanson were officially moved out leaving me with the overally annoying Keystone parents. I spend most of my days over at the Talon's house or sometimes Presley's. My life's been kind of quiet lately, no crazy gangs, ruthless parents, or out to kill ankles. Thank God for that. The only thing that has gotten worse was the therapy sessions. It wasn't anything bad, but my whole 'secret' thing between Base, Skylar, and I might not stay a secret for long. Josh seemed to be connecting pieces, how? I didn't know, but I did want to stop him. I had just walked in and was sitting on his brown single chair leather sofa.
"How are you?" He asked, in a genuine tone, not monotone like a doctor's. "Fine and you?" He smirked at my question. I was capable of being nice... just not very often. "Better now that someone's in a good mood," he settled down into the black arm chair in front of me, a long desk separating us. He leaned back, "who do you trust the most?" I blinked, "huh?" He took a pen from a cup of them and began twirling it in his fingers, "who do you, Ash Fault, trust the most?" I searched through my thoughts, I honestly had never thought about this question. In reality it was always Skylar, but a select few seemed to be making their way in my trust circle.
"Skylar I guess," I murmured, he clicked his tongue, "and?" I fought the urge to glare, raising my eyes to meet his, "maybe Henry, Heather, Presley, and Rio I guess." It was a longer list than my initial, but maybe that was a good thing. He clicked the pen twice, "and the least?" This wasn't a hard question, "Base and Mike." My tone was hard, metallic, it always went like this when I turned my emotions off. Josh quirked an eyebrow, "out of those two, who would you rather spend a month with?" My lips tightened to a straight firm line, "Mike." He frowned almost as if trying to comprehend my decision. "Tell me if this is correct. Mike, your biological father, abuses, beats, and sometimes came close to killing you. Base tried to kill you once... twice? Still you rather be with your dad?" This hit a nerve, "he's not my dad and Base wouldn't of killed me."
That part was true, Base was too self-centered to do that. His face told me the question before he even opened his mouth, "his goal was never to kill me or harm me enough to tempt death... he beat me sometimes, but not often. Not like Mike." Josh stood up, tossed me the pen, and slid a piece of notebook paper from his desk drawer on the table. "If you can't say what he did write what he did, or at least how it made you feel," he sat back down in the chair. I stared at the paper for a long time before picking up the pen and jotting a few words down.

Hurt
Trapped
Bad
Depressed
Emotionless
Numb
Blank
Lost

I had a few more words linger, but I refused to write them down with fear of giving it away. I sat the clean, smooth pen down. Josh took the piece of paper, crumbled it up, and threw it away. My eyebrows creased together confused. "That was your business not mine, when you eventually tell me what happened, will I ever ask to know what those words were." Josh then decided to turn on the TV. We tuned into a movie I don't ever remember seeing. I watched as a girl was pinned against the wall by two men. They began to violate her, she was forced to comply. It didn't show anything, but it wasn't hard to realize they were forcing themselves onto her. My body tensed as I fought off a flash back, I took in short quick breaths.
I tried to force myself calm, but my mind kept replaying the TV then the past, and now I was in a full blown panic attack. My finger tips gripped the edge of the sofa, my breathing rigid and uneven. Josh turned off the show quickly and came to my aid, "kid, hey, Ash, breathe a bit." My vision blurred as hot tears streamed down my once stoic expression, my facade crumbled. I could feel, smell, hear, taste, see everything. Josh reached out to touch my shoulder and I jumped back. He immediately withdrew his hand, "Ash, calm down, its over, they can't hurt you, you're safe." I couldn't, I used to get panic attacks every night when I was with them, and I hadn't gotten one about that since I was eleven. Three years later and my emotions have spiraled out of control.
"Ash, you need to take deep breaths, you're going to hyperventilate," his tone was soothing, but too late. I began to do just that. My chest heaved up and down hastily. I couldn't breathe. Every breath I took seemed to be a small stream of air intake, but nothing more. Not like I needed. He kept talking, but my brain blocked him out. I was sobbing by this point, my entire exterior, walls, everything gone. I was out of control, thrown into the passenger seat as my panic attack took the wheel. "Come on kid," he said once more as my condition worsened. At this point I was close to passing out. He grabbed a nearby plastic bag I had seen him use for his sandwich.
I saw a blur of peach and brown as he held it up to my mouth, I nearly threw myself out of the chair. I couldn't even see. "Hey, it's me Josh," he tried again, but I stood up. My knees buckled, I collided with the ground. "You know since I got my freaking driver's license it's time to go As-" Rio stopped, he walked over instantly recognizing the situation. "Yo, Ash, chill man," his voice was calm, but had the slightest bit of concern.

(Third Person)

Rio stood as Josh handed him the brown sandwich sack, he had never seen Ash so worked up. He was crying, actually crying. Rio had always known Ash to be this strong, get out of my face, joke around, type of guy. But this? This wasn't at all what Rio had become accustom too. It was odd to see Ash so frightened. Rio didn't even get a chance to try and get through to Ash before he lie unconscious. The boy looked up at Josh, "let's move him on the couch." Rio obeyed and they swiftly moved Ash. "What happened?" Rio finally said after a few minutes. Josh rubbed the back of his neck, "I turned on some TV show and he flipped out."
Rio thought for a moment, "but why would he overreact like that?" Josh was quiet for a long while after Rio spoke. Josh knew the answer, but he didn't want to admit it. After two minutes Josh lifted his head, "I don't know... maybe the police sirens or something in it." He knew that wasn't the reason, but he didn't want to betray Ash by letting out a secret. "I'll drive him home, you have fun," Josh said. Rio walked out with a slight wave.

(Ash's POV)

I sat up to see myself still in a therapy session, however after hours. What? Josh smirked at me, but not a full hearted one, this one was sad a bit pitiful. I frowned as I realized what had happened leading me to still being here. "Don't worry, I didn't tell anyone anything. I just have one question.... did Base-"

A/N:

You're welcome!!