Lost in the Castle

~12~

I put my finger on his lips, willing him to stop talking.
"No. You have nothing to be sorry about. I know about your life after me, and I understand. It's just... I didn't expect to meet any of them. I didn't realise that they are like you now, that they live forever... with you."

"Samara..." he murmured, pulling me closer and enveloping me in a tight embrace. I leaned against him contentedly, resting my head on his shoulder, and took a deep breath, the first one since I had left him outside the castle. His hands stroking my back gently were making me feel warm and protected. Why does his presence feel so good?

"I thought I... had lost you, when you met Vlad, that you would never want to see me again," he said, his voice low and sad. "Then the knights told me you met Andrei. He must have scared you."

Just the mention of that encounter made me shudder.

"How can you ever forgive me? How can I ever protect you, make you happy in this place?" Vlad continued, his voice fading into a tortured whisper.

"What are you talking about?" I asked, sitting up and cupping his face in my hands. His eyes looked so pained and worried... What have I done to him? I kissed him softly before I continued, "I'm fine. Nothing happened. Nothing of importance, nothing that can be altered now, anyway. We are together. This is where I want to be," I let my hands drop to his broad chest, over his strangely beating heart, "forever, and by your side. For... as long... "

He kissed the rest of my sentence off my lips, bringing me so close to him that I felt our bodies melt and mould against each other, pushing away every trace of the world we lived in, of our cruel destiny.

The kiss left me flushed and happy, all worries forgotten. There was just me and him, the two of us, nothing else mattered... I beamed at him, feeling reassured, and he returned my smile, looking as happy as I felt.

"You must be tired," he said after a while, "and hungry."

"No, not hungry, just a little tired." It had been such a long and eventful morning.

I hadn't noticed how, but all of a sudden, I was in his arms, breathless with surprise, as he carried me towards my bed. How does he do it?!

Once there, Vlad set me down on the wooden floor and helped me take the coat off, then wrapped me in my blanket. He made me sit on the bed, and sitting next to me undid my unravelling braid, freeing my hair and letting it pool around me. He caressed my cheek, his touch soft and gentle, and I leaned into his caress, eyes closed, my heart pounding crazily.

When I opened my eyes again, I met his warm, blazing look filled with love and something more, admiration or reverence, and I was sure that my own eyes reflected his look perfectly. The intensity of my feelings for this man was unfathomable, and it was growing still.

He shook his head and blinked a few times, then smiled. Pulling my legs over his lap, he started taking my shoes off. Surely you should do that on your own! my subconscious scolded, but I was unable to move or protest.

"You need to rest," he admonished, kissing me swiftly before standing up. "I'll find Katerina and make her get you something to eat."

"Are you not staying with me?" I asked, the words brimming with disappointment, wishing he would stay.

He shook his head. "I need to deal with our guests. I don't want them anywhere near you."

He didn't trust his own family around me. I would never become a proper part of his world then, I would always be an outsider, someone he would have to protect and worry about constantly.

I needed to think this through; surely there was a way to change this situation. To change me, to make me more fitting and appropriate for this place... I needed to think...

But as he smiled and kissed me again, on the little wrinkles on my forehead that formed there every time when I was worried or absorbed in thoughts, I knew I was too tired right now. My eyes started to close on their own accord and all I could focus on was the cocooning warmth trapped in my blanket, and his voice, coming from afar, "You mustn't worry, my love."