M A R I A N A
"so"
he drags the "o" sound. "how's everything going?" we've been in the classroom for about an hour now. well it felt like ages but the small clock at the front of the class says otherwise. "good, what about you?" he nods "good" silence again. this is so painful to go through. "i saw devyn's post of you going to the fair last weekend, you looked nice" he said smiling. why is he trying so hard just shut up? ok maybe i have a stick up my ass but i'm still thinking of all the worst case scenarios. "i saw you crying" i blurted out. why did i say that? what the fuck mariana. "in alex's tiktok or alvaro's snap?" he asked. oh my god that's a good coverup. "alvaro's snap, then ale's tiktok" i let out a little laugh rethinking the other snaps robert sent me that didn't get posted to the public. "why were your pants pulled down?" he shakes his head "i took a shit" we both laughed then it was silence again.
"i saw you kiss mar"
my eyes widen. i know he did but why did he have to bring it up. i didn't know what to say. what do i say? if i don't say anything soon it'll be weird. "yeah, i saw" was the best i could come up with. "i thought you guys were over the whole thing" he said. "that's what i thought about you and jenna"
i looked at his face that was full of shock. "it was" he said his jaw clenched a little. "that wasn't the case when you guys were sticking your tongues down each other's throats" mariana stop. i kept telling myself to stop. "i- that was" he started stuttering. "you had your tongue down mar's throat" i stood up and towered over him. "i barely even kissed him back" i said my voice raising a little higher now. "that's not what i saw" he stood up too, now towering over me.
"it doesn't matter what you saw" i said. "why'd you kiss him?" "why'd you get back with jenna?" "why'd you stop talking to me?" "you ignored my texts" we had a little argument, each sentence making us more heated than the last. "this is stupid" i said turning away from him. "we should just figure out how to get out of here" i said leaning against a table not wanting to be near him again. "maybe if we shout"i started but he shakes his head "we'll draw unwanted attention" he was right.
he started walking closer to me. he took one of my hands in his and said "just please tell me why you kissed mar". i look him in the eye "i didn't, he kissed me" mattia took a step back. "like without consent?" i nodded. "but i saw-" "like i said it doesn't matter what you saw"
i started to walk away again but he pulls me by my wrist. "i got back with jenna to-" he stopped his sentence. "what? spit it out polibio" i said making a small smile come to his face. "i've haven't heard that nickname in a long time" he said and i looked away. "i did it because, i had- i didn't know how to cope- i needed" he kept restarting his sentences.
he stops for a second but i realised his breathing started increasing. "mattia? are you okay?" i asked getting a little worried because he looked like he couldn't breathe. "mattia do you have asthma?" i asked and all he could do was shake his head no. okay i definitely was not overreacting, he couldn't breathe. "mattia what the fuck is going on?" he couldn't answer. i started panicking because i didn't know he got like this.
"mattia what do i do?" he supported his weight by putting each of his hands on either side of me on the table i was leaning on. he still tried really hard to breathe. then it hit me "are you having an anxiety attack?" he lets out a small "i don't know" before gasping for air again. "this better not be a trick mattia" but as i said that he collapses to the floor. shit shit shit what do i do.
i kneel beside him. "mattia stop it, stop taking in breaths and try to hold one in, it'll stabilise your breathing" he looks at me like i was stupid, so i shouted "help!" and he shook his head no. "what? mattia i don't know what to do, you have to hold your breath"i started to think about everything i learnt in my psychology class but nothing came to mind. i was rushing through my thoughts then it hit me.
i kissed him.
i kissed him long so that he would hold his breath and would be able to breathe a little steadier. i kept kissing him until i myself needed to pull away to breathe. he stared at me in disbelief and all i did was put my hand to his chest to focus on his breathing. after awhile he regained his breath and we both sat on the floor. "how'd you know you had to do that?" he said looking at me intently. "it's stupid" i said fiddling with my fingers. he looks at me waiting for my answer "i watched it on an episode of teen wolf, lydia kisses stiles to make him hold his breath, i wasn't sure if it was gonna work but if it didn't i was going toshout for help or worse break the door down as much as i can, i'd rather get in trouble then you-" i didn't finish my sentence because we both knew what could've happened.
"i did it because i was jealous" he said all of a sudden. "you didn't breath because you were jealous?" i asked raising an eyebrow. "no i mean the jenna thing, when i saw you kiss mar i thought that i was stupid for thinking that the feelings were mutual so i got back with jenna to drown out mine" he said glancing at the clock that read 10pm. "what feelings mattia?" i asked getting a little too close to him.
(a/n: woW 1000 words again, damn when am i gonna finish this guys 😳)
