Queen of the Headphone Zombies

Ensemble

"But Emerson's mom..."

I barely get the words out when Chelsea stops her feet and says, "She thought we were a couple, but it was a big fat lie. Your boy has some parental issues that have been messing him up for a while now." Chelsea, not one to stay completely focused on any conversation, walks over to my nightstand and picks up a stick of blue tinged gloss. "Ooh cute color."

I give an exasperated sigh and try to get her back on track. "You're saying that none of it was real? The selfie of the two of you..."

"Was a fake." She finished my sentence with a self-satisfied look on her face. "Something we took before we left to play the Halloween gig. Now that I think about it, pretty stupid move on my part. But Emerson needed a cover for being in the band and since you two weren't speaking at the time--you really did shut him down hard, man it was one seriously complete shut-out--I became his go-to excuse for everything." She was waving her hands wildly in the air while she talked. "Total UGM!"

Even I can't figure that one out. "What?"

"Undercover girlfiend mission."

Chelsea's expression suddenly turns serious again. "Em was in a real spot. His parents would flip out if they found out he was playing music. It was a dire situation and that's the only reason I agreed to help." Chelsea took a deep breath and slowly let it out.

"If it's true why didn't you say anything?" I demanded.

"I thought it was like fight club," her hands fly in the air. "The first rule is you don't talk about fight club. So I didn't talk about it!" She comes over and sits down next to me. "I swear to you Zoe I feel nothing for Emerson. And forget about him not being my type, an even better reason to believe me is because you know there is no way I would go after some dude that was in love with another girl."

My mouth drops at her mic-drop statement. "Wh-wh-what?"

"He loves you. And to quote my mom's favorite movie, he completes you." Chelsea reaches out and touches my arm. "I would have said 'you had him at hello' but I think you had him before you ever opened your mouth. He's GOB." I give her a look so she knows to decode. "Got it bad. Now stop being such an idiot and go find your guy and work this crap out." Chelsea stands up and walks back to the window while brushing off her pants. "How the two of you have lasted this long with your lack of communication skills is a mystery." Chelsea starts to climb through the window but stops and turns back towards me. "No wait...it's because of me. Yep, this whole relationship is all thanks to yours truly. I don't know what you guys would do without moi," she says with a wink and then she is gone.

I want to believe her and deep down I know I do. She's never done anything to betray me in all the years I've known her. But if it's true, did the idiots never stop to consider clueing me in? Having Emerson's mom show me that pic and hearing her call Chelsea Em's girlfriend was soul crushing. And if it was as Chelsea said, all an act, that doesn't mean I'm not still mad at them for putting me through all this shit.

My deep thought is interrupted as I jump clear out of my skin when Chelsea's face suddenly pops back into the window. "Almost forgot! Meet me at the music store at ten. And take some time to clean yourself up. Your hair looks like some birds have made a permanent residence." She gives me a wide grin. "You better get a move on, that's in twenty minutes! Crap I've got another stop to make! Chop chop! See you there." Then she is gone once again.

But is she really gone this time? I go to the window and watch her not so gracefully climb down the trellis before she walks back to her car. Her stride is determined, and I recognize that telling tilt of her head that means wherever she is going she means to kick some ass.