Queen of the Headphone Zombies

Decresendo

Human // Rag'n'bone Man

ZOE

My bedroom door bursts open and a blonde tornado rushes in. The door slams shut, and the whirlwind comes to rest against it, breathing hard.

"I made it! Dragon Lady is on a rampage, but I escaped."

I pull my beats off while simultaneously opening my mouth to ask the whirlwind, aka the person who I am no longer speaking to, AKA Chelsea, what she's doing in my room, but before a word passes my lips, she's flings herself across the room and jumps on my bed. The bed I've been quite happily lying on all day enjoying my solitude. Damn Chelsea and her rushing in without a call or text warning. I may have come to a truce with New Guy, but the person currently in my face is another story. I am still pissed as hell at her.

She takes one look at the expression on my face and bursts out, "Zoe, I'm so sorry! I can't believe what a complete bitch I've been! I had no idea, honestly. Sometimes my crazy takes over and I can't stop myself." She flies forward and her arms wrap around me. Even if I wanted to storm off the bed in a huff I can't, she's got me caged in.

Now she's pressing her cheek to mine, nuzzling me. WFT is going on? This is not our thing, this nuzzling. It's so unChelsea-like that I'm struck silent.

"I'm really, really, really, really sorry! You have to forgive me!" As the words roll out, she squeezes me harder.

Her really too many reallys plea gives me my voice back, and a bit of my spine as well. "Whining won't win me over, Chelsea." There is a hard edge to my voice and when I say the words, I push her away and scoot over to lean against the far wall. I cross my arms and give my former BFF a hard glare. I half expect her to start with more really really pleas, or move on to her famous pout, or maybe throw some of her dramatic crocodile tears my way. But what I'm met with instead is a look of sincerity.

Holly crap, is that genuine regret shining in her eyes? Yes, it's there in her eyes, in the curve of her mouth, even in the tilt of her head. Okay that does melt my heart a tiny bit, but I'm not letting her off the hook so easily, so I sit on the other side of the bed watching her with a firm look of disapproval on my face.

Chelsea furrows her brows in confusion and disappointment. She is still laying on the edge of the bed and as she watches me, she doesn't move or speak for a moment.

We stay like that, as the minutes tick by, frozen like statues watching each other.

We hardly ever fight and when we have in the past, I've always forgiven her the moment she has apologized. But not this time. Things have changed. For one I don't feel like being a doormat anymore. Not that Chelsea treats me like one most of the time. She doesn't, not really. Chels is just...well she can be oblivious to other people's feelings. She does what she wants and forgets that other people might get caught up in backlash of her schemes whether they want to or not. My girl is a force of nature not unlike a mighty thunder storm. And sometimes if you get caught up in that storm those high winds will blow you on your ass.

But Chelsea never intentionally hurts anyone.

No like that Dumb Fuck Dylan...

After making my deal with New Guy, which I've had second and third thoughts about, I replayed my entire relationship with DF in my head. I've been so heartbroken that I hadn't realized I painted a picture of him--pun intended--that made him seem so much better than he was. I somehow forgot about all of the times that he promised to take me out but ended up canceling because he had a painting to finish. I blamed the creative artist in him. But he's not creative, or an artist...or a good person. He is just an ass, a selfish ass. And if I am being totally honest and tearing off those rose-colored glasses, I have to admit to myself for the first time that he's shitty at art, and at drumming, and especially at being a boyfriend. He was a really sucky boyfriend. One that I constantly made excuses for or refused to see just how selfish and shitty he could be.