What is love? I thought I loved you and I still do, if it was love i felt then i shall keep feeling it forever, but was it love?
I loved you so why dont I love him, he is sweeter, I notices things I want, no need, him to, he writes for me he talks to me he wants me so bad, so why isnt that love why isnt that love when he is so lovely so very lovely but not my love, why dont I love him he is so much better I cant remember why I loved you I dont remember falling in love i dont remember the things you did that pulled me deeper into love with you everyday, I remember last summer, I remember you breaking me and then I remember you holding me I remember you sending my body into shock with your emotions, but I most remember being so so in love with you the whole time I remember wanting the person who couldnt send me more then 6 words, I remember wanting that person who had me in tears all summer I remember wanting him so so bad, so why did i want you so bad? You are undeniably the one person who made me saddest in my life but also you are the one who made me happy, you broke my heart telling me that I didnt make you happy anymore, that crushed me. But it's okay becasue I still found myself wanting to and if i couldnt make you happy i wanted you to find someone else to make you happy, so is that the conclusion I'm coming to? Love is wanting someone even when they brake you forgiving them right after they make you cry? Is love ignoring the heart break and tears because you care for them so much? Is that love? That cant be, love has to be more then that there must be something else, love shouldn't be one sided, I suppose it can be but it shouldn't, love should be both people wanting and both people sacrificing it all for just a small smile. Maybe that's not all love maybe every love is different maybe we have infinite types of love; a parents love, a sisters love, a brothers, a child, a friend, my love to you and my love to who ever comes next. For you dont love me anymore but I shall forever love you for that's who I am I will never forget you and I will always be here for those I love for I dont think its possible for me to feel the emotion loved I if I love you once I will love you always but if that's the case will my live run out? When I get married will I have enough love for them? Will I be able to give them what I gave and will give you? I hope so. I dont know anymore, I still cant remember falling in love with you I still dont remember the things that made me love you more but I know we were in love I know because when I think of you I am submerged into a feeling of nostalgia and a feeling I can only lable as love, I remember the feeling of being with you and the longing for you like I've never longed before and I just remember the way you made my heart feel even from 234 miles away I remember that I cant remember the reasons behind the feeling or the things you said to me sometimes I cant remember all of your face but I remember the feeling and I think that's more important and I think that feeling made the months of emotional torture and scars fade a little, sure it's a bandaid on a bullet wound, but it's a start, my bullet wound has scab over now, it's not bleading out, no one sees it anymore, no one can see me gushing out and look at me with pitty, I'm getting better, I'll be in love with you forever, but you left me on the side of the road with a bullet wound and a bandaid and now I'm walking again, I got a ride from someone else and hes perfect I cant get myself to love him but at least I'm not alone on the highway while you drive off to Augusta, hes my sunshine my lovely, you'll always be my love though
---------------------------------------------------------
I miss your teeth and your smile
I haven't seen them in a while
remember when you stole that
peace necklace from me at the store?
I miss your mom
and your dad
I miss your roommate and your cats
I've never had a kind of love like that before
and when you kissed my head
and left me in your bed to go to work
I remember feeling like
I could live right here for years
I had about fifty cents I couldn't pay your rent
but I loved you and that's all it meant to me
and when you left I was in tears
but I have a lover and I have a best friend
I'm doing well and I hope you listen to this
you'll always be my first kiss
but I have a life now and I've learned my lesson
I'm growing up and doing big things for me
you'll always be on my list
of all the good things that I miss
you're all the good things that I miss
I miss your hair, your nose
I miss the smell of your clothes
remember when you took me to Niagara falls
and we took photos all night long?
I can't believe I'm the one you chose
I really miss being at your shows
you know, we never got to perform our song
-
awfultune "things that I miss"
YOU ARE READING
What Even Is Love; My Collection Of Poetic Things
PoetryThe only reason I put this out here was because I couldnt share it with anyone in my life without upsetting them, so here we are... And I use this space as a sorta diary to sort my thought out so sometimes itll come off as greedy or ungrateful or je...
