Different

Chapter 10

Chapter 10
"Damn! I'm late!"
Thea shouted as she got out of the bed.
Why did I agree to this morning breakfast every Sunday? She makes it so early. I rather do lunch.
She hurried and got dressed, brushed her teeth, put her hair in a ponytail, ran out the door, and drove off.
She finally reached the wolf house and ran through the front door.
"I'm here! I made it!"
Thea shouted as she looked at Ann and Kristy.
"Yeah four minutes late!"
Kristy said. Ann laughed.
"Hey, last Sunday she was almost 10 minutes late. She's improving."
Ann said.
"Thanks Ann for being positive."
"Oh stop and get a cup of coffee. I'll get your plate ready, waffles, eggs and bacon."
Kristy said. Thea got herself some coffee and sat down.
"Where are the wolves?"
Thea asked.
"Out on a run."
"Is Axl with them?"
"Yes, as a matter a fact since you brought him up, he wanted me to talk to you."
Kristy said concerned.
"About what?"
"He said you have been distant lately. He feels like something is on your mind, but you won't talk about it, you always say everything is fine."
Kristy said as she handed Thea her breakfast plate.
"Classic Thea. Everything is fine."
Ann said sarcastically.
"Everything is fine."
"Yeah sure. Anyways, when I first moved in with my brother, I was heartbroken about you know, Gia's brother, and I was hurt about all the nasty stuff she was spreading about me. I didn't want to talk to Tommy about it, that's just weird talking about boy problems with him, and I lived with a bunch of boys so I couldn't talk to them either. I ended up writing down what I was feeling. Venting on paper. It actually made me feel so much better."
Kristy said while bending down under the counter.
"Here. You can start right after breakfast."
Kristy handed Thea a notebook.
"I don't need this, I'm fine."
"Thea it's been over a year since he left. You can't keep your feelings bottled up. It's just going to eat you inside and hurt others around you. Like Axl for example."
Ann told Thea.
"Fine. I'll write in this notebook even though I don't need to. Now can I eat my breakfast?"
"Yup, eat up then go home and write. I don't need you grumpy while you help us plan the baby's first birthday. Ann and I will start, but I need you ready to help us finish with the planning tomorrow. Got it?"
"Geez okay grumpy."
Ann started laughing. Thea finished her breakfast, then headed home.
Write my feelings down? Really? Am I being that weird? And for Axl to ask Kristy to talk to me? We tell each other everything, why hasn't he mentioned anything to me?
She arrived at home, parked the car and walked into the kitchen. She stared at the kitchen drawer for a couple of minutes, contemplating about this writing her feelings down. She finally opened the drawer to grab a pen and sat down at the kitchen table. She finally opens the notebook and starts to write.
So, hi. I don't really know how to start this; I have never done this before. That was a stupid way to start this. I'm told that if I write things down, I'll feel better. But I'm fine. I don't know what they are talking about. But here it goes, I guess. It's been 17 months since the war. I finally found a family to call my own. There's Kristy, who I guess you can say is one of my best friends, more like a sister I have always wanted. She's great. A pain in the ass sometimes, but she's a great friend and mother. Her daughter, who is named after me, Theanna, is the most beautiful and smart baby girl. I feel like she takes after me, stubborn. Axl and I baptized her a few months ago. I'm a god parent! I can't even believe it. Me in a church, not a good idea. I don't know how, but the nuns always know what I am. They have vampire senses, I guess. I felt like their stare was going to rip me into pieces while I was there. Theanna's first birthday is coming up and Kristy wants it to be the biggest party ever. I think she's so nervous because she thinks Tj is going to propose to her at the party. Tj isn't Theanna's biological father, but he takes on the role. He loves them both. He travels back and forth from his pack to ours so he can be with his girls. They started dating a couple months after the war. It's rough sometimes, but I'm there for them. Then there's Ann. She is one of my best friends also. She's Cody's mother. Cody is what started the war in the first place. He's living a normal life now with way more friends. I work with him on his powers a couple of times a week. It's hard because I'm not a witch, but we manage. I still haven't figured out how to get his mother's memories back of his father, but I'll never stop trying. There's Kai, our dog. We still haven't got his jumping on people under control. He just does as he pleases. My Pete! Another best friend. He's the funniest person you will ever meet. We hang out all the time. Little Liam! Well he's not so little anymore. He keeps up with Axl. He will probably take over Axl's position as alpha one day. Then there's Axl. Alpha of the pack. The elders chose him to be after Tommy died. Him and I, well we don't have a title. We just go with the flow. I guess you can say he's my best friend too, but he's much more than that. He holds me when he knows I'm upset about something, he makes me laugh and smile, I tell him everything. We can talk and talk for hours on the roof looking at the stars. He makes me a better person. I'm hardly ever mad at him. I haven't lost control of my powers since the war. I drink blood less often. Now that I think about it, maybe because I'm so calm all the time, and surrounded by happiness. I don't feel the urge as much. I still get thirsty of course, I'm a vampire, but it's different now. Axl takes me to different towns to feed, or Kristy gives me her blood. I hate taking it from her, but it's just sometimes. And that's my family.

Thea put the pen down, walked over to the couch to lay down and watch tv.
Some time went by and she gets up from the couch. She walks over to kitchen table, sits down and picks up the pen and opens the notebook.

Caleb. I haven't seen or heard from him in 17 months. The last I saw him was when his back was turned toward me, and he got in the car and drove away. A part of me knew it was the right thing for him to do for himself and for me, but the other part of me is so mad at him. So mad that it hurts to think about. He was supposed to stay and be a part of this family. This weird and dysfunctional family. Him and I would argue all the time. He would get me so upset. I would get him upset. That's the part everyone knew about him. They knew he was full of anger and couldn't control himself, he didn't get along with anyone. But there's a side that I knew that no one else did. He was sweet when he wanted to be. He never judged me, even when he found out I was a vampire. His laugh. His laugh was funny to me. He didn't do it much, but he would laugh around me. He even joked. His jokes were dumb, but he tried, and they made me laugh. I know he tried to be good. He tried for me. I felt it. I know that him seeing me around Axl made him angry. Me and Axl, well we make being around each other so easy. As if we are one. Caleb knew how I felt about Axl, which made him even more angry. I never told him personally how I felt about Axl, but I know he knew already. Yes, the feelings I have for Axl are strong, but never did Caleb ask me how I felt about him. I tried telling him once, but he cut me off and just told me I belong with Axl. It made me feel as if he didn't want me. He never let me tell him that I felt whole when he was around. He was the missing piece to my puzzle. I want Axl, but I need Caleb. What the hell does that even mean? Now I realize why Axl and the girls think something is wrong. I'm still holding onto the anger I have for Caleb for leaving, holding onto the hopes of him coming back to me. Day after day I get my hopes up. I just have to admit to myself that he's gone. I never even told him goodbye. So, I guess that's what's holding me back from enjoying my new life. I think I never told him goodbye because I never thought he would be gone forever. But he's gone. Forever. Goodbye Caleb.

Thea closed the book and threw it in the drawer, slamming it shut.
I don't know if I'm mad, sad or relieved. I think I feel a little bit better letting it all out. Kristy was right.
She then grabbed the phone and called Axl.
"Hello."
"Hey come over."
"Is everything alright?"
"Yes, everything is fine. I just really want to see you."
"Okay I'll be right over."
Thea hangs up the phone.
Why do I feel so anxious to see him? I see him all the time. My stomach is in knots. I'm nervous. Why am I nervous? Why am I staring out the window as if he has superpowers and is coming right this second? Do I love him? Love? Am I in love with him?
Thea sat down on the couch and thought about it. As she sat there thinking, Axl finally walks through the door.
"Thea?"
Thea didn't answer. He walks over and sees her on the couch.
"Hey what's wrong?"
Axl asks as he sits next to her. He grabs her face with his hand to have her face him. They look at each other. Then Thea leans in and kisses him. The kissing gets more intense, Thea pulling at the back of his hair. Axl's hands are all over her body. He then picks her up and takes her into the bedroom. He lays her down gently on the bed, and gets on top of her, kissing her lips, her neck, her stomach, he starts to undo her pants. He takes them off and throws them on the floor. He kisses her lips again.
"Are you sure?"
Axl whispers. Thea then takes off her shirt and then Axl's.
"Yes."
Thea whispers back. Axl smiles and kisses her, unzipping his pants at the same time. Thea runs her fingers along his arms feeling his muscles and then traces his abs. Then Axl is inside of her while he is kissing her neck. Thea digs her nails in his back as he's going back and forth. She uses her strength and flips him over. She is now on top of him, pleasuring him with her movements. Then Axl sits up. He kisses her gently on the lips. Thea smiles.
"We need to shower."
Thea whispers.
"You can go first if you want to."
"I clearly said we as in the same time."
Axl smiles and they both walk to the bathroom. The water is warm, running down their bodies. Thea looks at the water running down Axl's muscles and Abs. She looks up and see's that he's looking at her, admiring her beauty. Thea smiles then hugs him tightly. Axl wraps his arms around her.
"Everything that just happened, everything that I felt, it was like beautiful magic that I have never experienced."
Thea tells Axl. He hugs her even tighter in his arms. They both wash up and get out of the shower and get dressed. Then they go to the couch and turn on the tv. Thea leans on Axl as they watch funny movies together. After the movies they make dinner, frozen pizza. They eat and go back into the bedroom to lay down on the bed. They talk for hours. Axl falls asleep while Thea lays her head on his chest with her arms wrapped around him, but she couldn't sleep.
What is wrong with me? I should be sleeping. I have everything I could ever want. I'm happy.
Hours go by. She finally sits up and looks at the clock.
It's almost sunrise. I figured it out. There's one thing left to do. One thing that will close the Caleb chapter forever. I need to go to the place where the feelings all started.
Thea touches the necklace on her neck that Caleb gave to her.
It's time to let this go.
Thea looked over at Axl who was fast asleep, then she got up from the bed slowly. She put her shoes on and a cardigan over herself. Then she started to walk toward the front door. She looked in the mirror by the door and saw a glow in her that she has never saw before.
I finally let myself be truly happy.
She smiled and walked out the door and drove off. She would drive fast then slow down. She was nervous.
Facing this is scary. Saying goodbye forever is even scarier. I need to get there as fast as I can to get this over with, but am I really ready to let Caleb go?
She finally parks. She gets out of the car and walks toward the cliff where it all started. The roller coaster of emotions that would lead her to this day. She walks toward the edge. The sun is rising.
It's so beautiful.
The ocean breeze is passing by her. She closes her eyes and all the memories of Caleb flood her mind. His smile, his laugh, his touch on her skin, his touch on her lips when he kissed her, his grin when he's angry, his smell, his awful jokes that made her laugh, the butterflies in her stomach as she danced with him, and the painful last time she saw him. Tears started to flood her face.
I can do this. I must let him go.
She started to grab her necklace to rip it off from her neck and throw it into the ocean, but then she hears footsteps approaching her and recognizes a smell. She turns around and it's Caleb leaning against a tree, smiling at her. Thea runs full speed toward him and jumps into his arms and they kiss. Caleb's shirt was getting wet from all the tears coming down from Thea's eyes. Caleb holds her so tight as he saviors every moment that his lips are touching hers. Her hands are touching his face as she kisses him to make sure he's real and not an illusion. Caleb then puts Thea down. They both are standing with their foreheads touching just like before he left her, but this time they are looking into each other's eyes. They kiss one more time, then Caleb whispers,
"Thea.........I love you."
End