Delinquent

Delinquent - Chapter 21

            “I really have to go.” I said after I was able to speak. What just happened was horrifying. The worst part was that I let it happen. What was even worse was that I liked it. I returned to throwing clothes in my bag. There was no way I was staying with either Paul or Chase now. I couldn’t stay with them. They were my brother’s friends, and it’d be too awkward. I shook my head. Maybe my father was right. Maybe I really was a whore. I hadn’t slept with that many guys….but I made out with plenty. Paul, Chase, Noah, my own brother. I wouldn’t count Eli as a make out, but I did kiss him also. What kind of dignity did I have? Gosh, I was messed up. I needed help.  

“Wait…” Caleb said grabbing my arm gently. I pulled out of his grasp and smacked him across the face.

“Stay away from me. You’re disgusting.”

“You kissed me too.” He said not even reacting to when I smacked him. He looked like he had been keeping emotions bottled up, and it had blew the top.

“I don’t care, you did it first! Now get out! This is wrong!”

“Don’t you think I know that?” he said dropping his hands to his side. “Ever since that night that…ever since the night Chris—“ he started again, “made us do that, I’ve been totally repulsed by you. In fact, I just hated being around you, I never wanted to talk to you again forgetting me involved—“

“For getting you involved? I got you involved?!!” I cut him off.

“Who haven’t you gotten involved? You got Paul involved, you got Chase involved, and Chelsea involved…who else?” I stared at him clenching my fists. How dare he. How dare he say that to me? “You’ll probably get that Noah guy involved too. When are you going to take responsibility for your actions? Chelsea and I have been telling you, been telling you—“he put emphasis on that and he sounded more angry as he said it.. “That you should stop what you were doing with that gang. But did you listen? No. Cassidy never listens to anybody until it’s too late. You almost got Chase killed because you wanted money. All you ever think of is yourself! You call me selfish? You’re the queen of that! You’d sacrifice someone else’s life for your satisfaction!” he yelled. He suddenly reached into is pocket, pulled out his wallet and took out a wad of bills. He took them apart separately and tossed the money in my face. “There’s your fucking money. All you had to do was ask. You’re ungrateful.” I felt tears start to form in my eyes and they started falling.

                “I don’t want your money…” I said sitting down on my bed. “I just want to be happy. I want to go back in time and change what I’ve done…I’m an awful person.”

“Yes, yes you are.”  I looked at him, but I could hardly see him. My tears were blurring my vision.

“God Caleb, you aren’t supposed to agree with me.”

“You want me to lie to you and tell you how wonderful you are for hurting people for your own needs? Fine. Or how about lying to you about how fortunate you are. You live in a decent house with a decent family—“

“Don’t you dare talk to me about decent anything? My father just hit me and my brother just kissed me! Nothing is decent around here.”

“Oh right, just because you screwed up your life it means that things are horrible for you.” He told me. “But everyone makes mistakes. What are you doing?” he gestured to the bag that I was stuffing clothes in. I shrugged.

“Packing, what does it look like?”

“Why?”

“Dad hit me Caleb, did you not see that? They practically hate me because you lied to them and told them that I was with you.”

“I’m sorry. Don’t runaway though.” I looked up at him. Now I was curious. Why did he want me to stay?

“Why not?” I asked.

“I don’t want you to…” I blinked and looked down at the floor. Well, this was awkward.

                “Caleb, what’s going on here? We’re brother and sister….”

“I feel horrible about this Cassidy, really I do. I feel disgusted with myself, but…I don’t know. I just have this feeling.”

“Well keep your feelings to yourself. I don’t want them.” He looked a little hurt by that. I sighed and got up off the bed a little. I hugged him close. “I’ve been feeling the same way Caleb, but…it’s wrong.”

“I know.” He said running his fingers through my hair.

“Well anyway, I have to go find Chelsea.” I broke away from him. I felt dirty. I needed another shower. I was about to go into the bathroom for a shower when I felt my phone vibrate in my pocket. Paul was calling. Crap! I’d forgotten all about them being outside. I answered the phone and told them to give me to minutes. I hung up and started searching for something else to put on, which was what I was supposed to be doing in the first place. With all the drama that just went down in the past ten minutes, Caleb rolled I’d forgotten all about Paul and Chase outside.

“What are you doing now?” Caleb asked.

“I have to go find Chelsea. You know, my best friend that you and Paul lost.” Caleb rolled his eyes.

“We were all drunk. I’m sorry.”

“Whatever. I don’t want any excuses.”

“Can we talk about this?”

“Talk about what?” I stopped searching and looked at him. “There’s nothing to talk about. We’re brother and sister for crying out loud. I’m surprised I didn’t throw up yet.”

“We’ll talk about it later.” He said leaving the room. Finally he was gone. I slumped to the floor and put my face in my hands. How could my brother and I want each other in that way? It was just…eww. I couldn’t let anyone find out. Not even Chelsea. I sighed. I hated keeping secrets; I was good at it though. I kept secrets from Chase and Paul, and now Chelsea.  Yeah, Caleb and I definitely needed to talk about this.

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Really short chapter, I know. Finding Chelsea is going to be a big thing though. So, it might be in two parts...not really sure yet. I have everything worked out, I just don't know how I want to organize it yet.

So it might be up later tonight or technically tomorrow, Idk yet.

Vote, comment?

Thanks...