You, Always

Chapter Twenty-Nine: Put An 'M' On 'End', It Gives You Mend

There's a collection of photos ranging from one of the first pictures of us when I was born all the up to the holidays we went on before everything went downhill. I run my hand over each page but when I get to the last page, my lip quivers.

A letter is held in the pocket at the back and my name is written on the envelope. My heart starts to beat fast when I open it, pulling the piece of paper which is folded inside.

Mandy,

If you're reading this then I'm so sorry the treatment didn't work honey, and it looks like I'm no longer here. I'm not sure what circumstances you will be given this box but hopefully, if everything goes the way I want it to, I won't have to give it to you at all. But if I do, then I hope I can give it to you to open if anything happens.

I'm sorry that you had to watch me grow sicker as the days passed and I did hope I'd get better for you but I guess everything in life can't go our way.

But let me say this, Mandy. You made me feel better than any medicine or treatment ever did. I am and will forever be proud of you. I'll be watching over you wherever you go, whatever choices you make I'll support you—just like I would've if I were still alive.

There should be a necklace in the box. I want, well I hope, you wear it everyday just as a reminder that I'm here with you.

You were the greatest thing to ever happen to me throughout all the years I lived and I hope you live the best life you can, taking everything life throws you. Good or bad. Because no matter what happens, I know you'll get through because you always do. You're the strong young woman I've raised you to be.

If or when you have kids I know that they would have made me just as proud as you did and don't forget to tell them stories about their grandmother!

You are extraordinary Mandy and I love you so much. I missing you and I'm not even gone yet.

—Your mother

I'm sobbing at this point but I'm extra careful not to get my tears on the letter. I can't ruin it. It will be the closest thing I'll ever have of her. It's her handwriting. She would have touched this page, run her finger across the ink just like she always did when she finished writing. I could hear her voice while I was reading it. It was almost as if...

She was the one reading it to me.

A voice startles me even if I can just about hear it. I look up and there in the doorway he stands.

I love him just as much as I did when I last saw him.

"Princess?" He kneels right next to me and I think he was about to put his arms around me but decides against it. Probably not sure how I'd react but I need him right now. I don't want to but I'm so glad he's here.

I hug him and cry into his chest. "Hey... It's okay..." He soothes and I quickly pull away.

Stupid Andie.

"What are you doing here?" I ask quietly.

"Josh told me where you were and I thought you would want someone here with you." I looking at the floor, making sure to put the letter back in its places so it doesn't get creased. "I needed to make sure you're okay. Even if you do hate me..."

That's when I finally look up and my pain reflects in his eyes. "You think I hate you?" I whisper. "I don't hate you."

"I wouldn't blame you." He mumbles and I put the necklace over my neck.

"Even after everything, I don't think I could ever hate you." I smile sadly.

"You could've fooled me. We haven't spoken in what feels like years. The guilt... Not speaking to you... It's killing me." God, I've missed the sound of his voice.