PRANKS and KISSES | 1 ✔️

Chapter 6: Broccoli and Cookie

You're a "Rolling Stone" boy
"Never sleep alone" boy
"Got a million numbers and they're filling up your phone", boy

-Ghost, Halsey

***

When I was a kid, all I wanted was to become a broccoli.

My mom told me that I wouldn't talk to anybody, and when asked why, I would always tell them:

"Because I'm a broccoli, and broccolis can't talk. I'm not actually talking right now. All of it is just in your head."

I always wore my green broccoli costume, sat on the corner like some sort of a crazy person, and tried my best to act like a vegetable.

It was super fun.

My broccoli obsession became so problematic that my mom finally decided to have a heart-to-heart talk with my four-year old self. The conversation went something along these lines:

Mom: Sky, honey, you are not a broccoli. You are an actual human being.

Me: But I don't want to be a human being. Human beings are bad. Broccolis for the win!

Mom: Oh baby, there are also good human beings. And if you want to have more good people, you should be one yourself.

Me: But... but... Broccolis are good. They make people healthy and stuff.

Mom: You can be a good person too by going out and making some friends.

Me: I don't want to go outside! There are people there!

Mom said it took another month of convincing before I finally accepted my humanity.

I already forgot about that weird childhood dream of mine but the moment I saw Hunter waiting for me in front of my locker came Monday morning, all I could think of was:

Oh, God, please! Turn me into something else. Maybe a broccoli or a potato or anything that Hunter won't recognize!

But alas, the heavens wouldn't hear any of my stupid requests.

"Sky!" Hunter shouted as soon as he saw me grumpily walking towards my locker.

Did he really have to announce my name in front of the whole freaking school? This guy was bringing out the murderer in me.

And because Hunter was so annoyingly popular, everyone who heard him stopped what they were doing to follow his gaze.

Their eyes automatically looked past where I was but when they realized that I was the only one there, they reluctantly settled their eyes on me. All of them had the same confused expression on their faces, like that was the first time they ever saw me (Fun Fact: I had been studying in this school since seventh grade).

I felt like I was on a death march while walking towards my locker. Everyone just kept on staring at me and whispering to each other.

"Who is she?" I heard someone asked.

"I don't know. A transfer student maybe?" answered Jonas Kirk. I sat beside him in Spanish class our whole junior year.

I didn't know if I should feel insulted or glad about that.

I kept my head low, wishing I followed my gut instinct and just kicked Hunter to the cliff when I had the chance. Now it was too late.

I felt so self-conscious with all those eyes on me that I couldn't even walk like a normal person. I was sure I was walking like an epileptic zombie who was also suffering from severe constipation.