☆ﾐ 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐛𝐨𝐲

𝐞𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭!

warnings.
i mean it's pretty damn sad but i guess it's okay

[ ✰✰ ]

jonah wasn't himself without corbyn, he couldn't stop himself from going back to the blonde. even though he knew the blonde was bad for him, every time he ran back to corbyn, even though everytime, he ended up getting hurt.

"corbyn, you said you would meet me at the park after work, but you never showed! you cannot keep doing this to me" jonah seethed. "you're too controlling, jonah! i can't fucking do this anymore!" corbyn yelled from the other side of the phone, clearly angry.

"w-what?" jonah asked softly, clearly shocked. his finger was hovering above the end button, but he didn't move it. "we're done" corbyn scoffed, hanging up before jonah could even open his mouth.

[ ✰✰ ]

the next day after doing absolutely nothing but sobbing, jonah's phone rang. he sprang off the bed and grabbed his phone. corbyn's name lit up the screen and jonah answered it. "h-hi" jonah muttered, almost too excitedly. "hi, beautiful boy" corbyn giggled, "i miss you"

"we broke up, corbs" jonah sighed.

"you sound fucking crazy, bubba, we didn't break up, i was being my dramatic self" corbyn said, not sounding at all like himself. "wait, what?" jonah asked, practically squealing. he was happy, but he knew it wasn't healthy in the end, it never ended up good, especially with corbyn. "i mean, as far as i know, i'm not crazy. woah, i sound weird" corbyn said, laughing hysterically.

"are you high, corbs?"

"huh? hi? yes, hi, jo" corbyn said, utterly confused. jonah frowned. "no, i asked-never mind, it's not important"

"you're cute as fuck, jo" jonah wanted to ignore the feeling, he really didn't want to feel like this.

[ ✰✰ ]

it didn't come as a surprise when corbyn came over the next day, and blew up over nothing. he didn't have any reason to get mad, but he got mad anyway. corbyn broke it off again, leaving jonah more confused.

why did he keep getting hurt? and why does he keep running back?

he needed answers but he wasn't getting any. he grabbed the bottle of vodka from his pantry and downed it, not caring about how bitter it tasted. all he wanted to do was drink, and while drinking he decided to pretend he was over corbyn, knowing that was a complete lie.

it was kind of like a never ending cycle; the countless fights, high calls, and the oh so many nights, but nothing would ever be fixed. it was toxic for the both of them, they had no control over it. the only rational thing they could do was distance themselves, but jonah couldn't spend a single day without corbyn.

it was unhealthy, he depended on corbyn, like corbyn was his oxygen, food, and water. without corbyn, jonah felt empty, he hated when corbyn broke up with him, but he felt like a kid in love when they got back together.

but it never had a happy ending, but at this point, corbyn was jonah's drug; he was addicted to corbyn. it was unhealthy and other people around him were starting to notice. "jo, i invited you over last night, you never showed, where the hell were you?" jack asked as the two friends had a conversation sprawled out on the bed. "on the phone with corbyn" jonah mumbled, fumbling with his bracelets. "what about earlier this morning?"

"drinking" jonah replied, ignoring jack's reaction.

"about how many times have you broken up now?" the blonde asked, knowing it was well over ten times. "by now, probably eighteen" jonah replied. jack sighed running his hands through his freshly cut hair, jonah kept looking at jack weirdly. "what?" jack asked, losing his train of thought. "it's just weird not seeing you without your curly hair" jonah shrugged. "don't change the subject, i know that's what you're trying to do" jack said, as he rolled his eyes.

"the point is, you have to let him go, for good. it's not healthy. you're killing yourself, but you don't see it. break up with him for good, help yourself" jack said, trying to convince the brunette. "but you see, i can't. i try to fight it, but every time i think i'm finally free-he gets high and calls me, and i feel so weak being a kid in love. then, he goes and breaks it off again, i get drunk, lie to myself that i'm over him, spontaneously combust, and wear myself out"

"you cannot keep doing this" jack said, his voice more demanding.

"i can't control how i feel, our connection is too strong, jack, and i can't forget that, no matter how hard i try. i know it's toxic, but i love him, and i know he loves me" jonah lied, knowing that corbyn didn't love him.

"leave him"

"jack, i've tried, so many times, believe me. it never works, he has this power over me, and i can't do this alone" jonah said softly, his voice weak and completely broken. "he's going to keep hurting you, jonah, you can't let yourself get hurt any more, break it off sooner than later, i promise you'll feel better"

"i'm sorry" jonah sobbed, tears falling down his cheeks.

"what?"

"i can't"

jonah didn't have the strength to let corbyn go. he kept going back no matter how much he tried. it was almost like corbyn was a drug, and jonah needed the fix.

jonah would always go back, and nothing would ever change.

authors note.
like i said, it's sad. you want to know what else is sad? jack cutting his hair. BUT what makes it better is that it makes him look 10x more attractive and the fact that he dyed it for lav makes my heart warm. okay i'm done now, expect another oneshot tonight because i'm on a roll okay?

final edit on june twenty seventh, twenty twenty three  i think i wrote this right after my ex got drunk and broke it off with me and then the next day called me and said he missed me lmao.