☆ﾐ 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐛𝐨𝐲

𝐨𝐧𝐞!

warnings.
a bit of sadness to start off because that's just how i do
it alright?

[ ✰✰ ]

corbyn sat near the window, his head pressed against the glass, his legs stretched out in front of him. it was the quietest he'd ever been since jonah met him three years ago. corbyn was someone who was born to speak and laugh, not sit in utter silence like this — it just didn't feel right.

but then again, jonah couldn't speak either.

jonah's throat was sore from the sobs he held in just fifteen minutes ago. everything in his body felt heavier than it was, and his heart — jonah's heart felt broken in ways he never even imagined possible.

how could saying goodbye to the love of his life hurt this bad? how was jonah still breathing? the answer is — he wasn't.

beside the window, corbyn wiped his eyes, making jonah tear up again. it hurt to see corbyn so upset, and if jonah could, he would take away all the pain and make him forget, he'd make him forget about all the memories they had, he'd do anything to make corbyn forget.

which is why jonah decided to let him go. there's a point where two people reach together when the path that used to sit in front of them isn't there anymore, it just comes to an end. and this time, it was for corbyn and jonah.

jonah knew it for a while now, and he thought that corbyn did too, but they kept on pretending their feelings for each other because of how much they loved each other. the bond they had, it was unbreakable, but here they were, tearing it apart.

"do you remember last christmas?" corbyn asked, breaking the eerie silence. "remember that cabin i saved up to rent for us? i miss that week we had to ourselves, probably one of the best weeks of my life"

jonah turned away from him, his shoulders shaking as he tried to hold in another sob. jonah didn't want to remember, not now, but his mind brought it back, that christmas week with corbyn. that memory, it would be kept close.

"please stop," jonah managed to say, wiping his eyes again. "it hurts so much and — just, stop, okay?"

corbyn stood up, facing jonah for the first time in what felt like forever. his beautiful face — the very same face that jonah fell in love with, was now solemn and empty. corbyn's eyes were red and so was his nose, and jonah held himself back because all he wanted to do was bring corbyn close. how long was it going to take jonah's body to realize there wasn't going to be a person to touch and admire anymore?

"i thought i made you happy" corbyn dropped his head, and foolishly, jonah stepped forward, eager to comfort him, but he stepped back knowing he couldn't, not anymore.

"you know you make me happy, corbyn, but — "

"but what? why are you doing this? why now? what did i do?"

jonah shook his head and pushed down another sob. "you didn't do anything" jonah croaked, angry with the shift in his voice. "i love you so much — i do, and i always will, but i've been so caught up in loving and supporting you that i've lost myself along the way. i want to be more on my own, not just with you"

corbyn raised his head, his cheeks drained of their color, and his eyes sad. "let's talk this out, please, help me understand"

"corbyn — "

"let's take a break, however long you want, and when you're ready we can start over"

the thought of starting over with corbyn sounded nice, but once you commited a relationship with someone, there's no starting over.