Who Am I Without Him? (Laurmani)

three pt II.

                                                                     A/N there's talk about sexual abuse in this chapter.

OMNISCIENT POV

Everything was going well and Lauren was grateful that she didn't have to constantly look over her shoulder for the guy that she hated to love. At some point, Normani had been off in a corner talking to a few girls from her gymnastics class, she'd look over every few minutes and watch as Lauren conversed with Ally or Dinah. But, that particular conversation had garnered her attention for more than a few minutes, so when she looked over to check on Lauren once more, she realized that the younger girl was nowhere in sight.

Leaving her current conversation, Normani walked over to Dinah and asked if she had known where the Latina had run off to. When the taller girl told her that Lauren had went upstairs with a drunken Jake, Normani sobered up, she ran up the stairs taking them two at a time. The house that they were in was rather large with multiple bedrooms on both the second and first floor, so Normani burst into every room until she reached the last door, when she went in, the room was completely dark, so she turned to leave. Just as she went to take her first step, she heard the sound of sniffles. Flicking on the lights, Normani could see the outline of a body between the bed and nightstand, she closed the door behind her.

"Lauren? What's wrong, baby?" The older girl walked slowly over to her friend and knelt down when the Latina opened her arms wide enough, she crawled into them and hugged her tightly, "Tell me what's wrong, babe."

"He-he told me he needed to talk, said that we had to be alone. When he asked me to come back, said he needed me. I told him I didn't want to see him anymore. H-he," Her voice broke, Normani shushed her and ran her fingers through her hair a few times. It was something she'd learned calmed the girl, "Mani, h-he raped me."

At that, Normani felt like complete and utter shit. She was supposed to be there, and she wasn't. It was her fault. For the next hour, Normani consoled her friend, promising that things were gonna get better.

"Lo, this is the last straw. No more of this cat and mouse game. He raped you, no excuse you make up for his behavior is gonna be good enough to get past this. Let me tell my father, he can help you. Please, Lo, you deserve so much more. I can't and won't keep this a secret anymore."

"Please just make it stop," Lauren nodded tearfully.

The next morning, before her dad headed off to work as a police officer, Normani stopped him and came forward with her statement and together they went to Lauren's home. They knocked at the door and stood there together, waiting the single minute that it had taken her to come to the door.

"I told him about what happened, like we discussed. We can talk about it and get the papers filed," Normani said when the girl had opened the door.

Officer Hamilton nodded, "I'm prepared to take your statement, Ms. Jauregui, then we can bring in Mr. Daniels."

Lauren frowned and closed the door a little so that they couldn't see behind her, "I don't know what you're talking about, Mani."

Shocked at what the girl was saying, Normani, leaned in to glance behind her and when she got close enough, she could smell the faint scent of the cologne that Jacob had worn since freshman year. Her eyes widened even more and her mouth dropped, they'd arrived too late.  He had already gotten to her.

Lauren looked at Normani's dad apologetically, "I'm sorry she brought you here for no reason, Mr. Hamilton. I was at the party, I'll admit that. We went together, but I have no clue what she's talking about."

The Latina snapped her fingers as if she had just remembered what had happened, "Wait, I think I know. Jake and I had a horrible argument. I was pretty drunk and crying, after he left, Mani came in and saw me in the state I was in. My clothes were hanging off, because I had thrown myself on to him, but he didn't want anything to do with me in my state. I was out of it and incoherent, she probably misinterpreted something I had said. But, much credit to her because she saw to it that I got home safe and was okay. Unfortunately, she thought something happened that didn't. She did do the correct thing by talking to you, but like I said nothing happened. I'm so sorry to have wasted your time."

The feeling that coursed through Normani's body was something similar to being stabbed in the back. She felt betrayed and humiliated. When her dad looked over at her with a disappointed glare, she felt even worse.

"He's in there, isn't he? Let me in, Lo," Normani yelled, trying her hardest to rush past the girl, when her dad lifted her up and over his shoulder like he did while she was a child.

"Mani, stop it right now," Mr. Hamilton said sternly to his daughter.

"I'm alone, sir. You can come in if you want and see for yourself," Lauren said keeping her straight face.

"That won't be necessary, Lauren. I'm sorry about this," The older man replied and carried his daughter down the steps. She was still kicking and yelling, telling him to go inside.

"I'm sorry for the misunderstanding, sir," Lauren waved then went back into her house and took a deep breath. She felt like shit, lying to the police and for hurting someone who had quickly become her best friend. She had never seen the older girl so utterly humiliated, that was what hurt the most.

It was a bright and sunny Saturday afternoon when Lauren had stopped by the Hamilton household, it was exactly one week since the rape, the pale girl wanted to stop by and apologize to her friend, invited her to see a movie or something. Knocking at the door, Lauren waited patiently for someone to open up. It was Normani's sister, Arielle, who answered and once she saw that it was Lauren, her face immediately shifted to a glare.

"What the fuck do you want?"

"May I speak with Normani?" Lauren asked, giving the girl her best puppy eyes. Arielle stared blankly at her for a few seconds.

"She's gone."

"Well, when will she be back?" Lauren pleaded, looking up at the slightly taller girl.

"She's not coming back," Arielle replied shortly. She glanced down at her fingernails and rolled her eyes.

"What? What do you mean?"

"I said, she's not coming back. Which part don't you understand?"

"All of it," Lauren sighed and looked behind the girl who had the door wide enough for her to see in.

"She's not coming back. She moved upstate to stay with a family member, seeing as she couldn't stand being around our father's disappointed stare any longer. You can check her room if you want," Arielle rolled her eyes getting more upset at having to explain it to the younger girl, "And don't expect her to go to UCLA like you both had planned, she's going somewhere different."

"Where?" Lauren croaked, choking back the tears that were soon to run rampant.

"As far away from you as she could get, you bitch," The girl had wanted to say more to hurt her but decided against it. She walked into her empty home and slammed the door in Lauren's face.

Lauren wiped her eyes as she ran away from the house and to her car. When she got in, she did her best to make it right, pulling out her phone and calling her best friend's number. The recording she got, told her that the number was disconnected. Now, the lump in her throat felt like a brick.

.

PRESENT DAY

The previous night, was the first time that Lauren had seen or heard from the other girl in  4 years. After everything, the girl still invited her into her home albeit grudgingly and it humbled her heart. For reasons she couldn't even begin to understand, the girl still cared, she knew that much.

But why?

Getting up in the dark, Lauren walked to Normani's room and opened the door quietly. She watched as the older woman tossed and turned, and gently wiped away the tear that had slid down her cheek. Thinking of the look of humiliation the older woman had, she choked back a sob and made her way back to the living room.

"I'm so sorry, Mani. Please forgive me."