Husbands But Not

27: Bastum 1

"If you're expecting me to start the conversation then I have bad news for you." it didn't cross me how people were looking at us every here and there. We weren't dating, yet the judging eyes never left me.

"I'm just worried." Noah said.

"What's wrong?"

We were nearing the exit gates and the noise seemed to get louder by the minute.

"Come to my house today and I'll tell you."

"Is this your new way of inviting me over?" I joked. I was going to his place anyway.

"Maybe."

"We'll see." with that, Noah and I parted ways.

When I got home, dad wasn't there. I opened the fridge to find it almost empty. Dad ate at work most days. Not that I was his son and lived under his roof and had to eat too.

My stomach threatened to give out on me as I recalled the brick pizza I ate today.

I shuffled through the cupboards until I found a cereal box. I ripped it open and poured a decent amount into a cup.

The smell of the milk left me repulsed so I just sacked on them as I went on with my day.

I showered and changed as quickly as possible. My fever was more or less under control and the bruises were starting to fade, and with them, the pain. I lay down on my bed and contemplated taking a nap. It was my illness deciding on my behalf.

I went over the overwhelming possibility of dad passing by home and finding me asleep and doing God knows what. I decided to not sleep.

I walked to Noah's house. Thankfully, it didn't rain on my way there, and the weather in general was much more pleasant, despite the absence of the sun.

I knocked and waited. I was a little anxious since this was my first time not sneaking in through his window, or going home with him.

Going home with him. I wished it was that simple. For the longest time, I thought of 'home' as the place one went to at the end of the day.

I was so wrong.

I wanted to run down the street and scream. Scream at the top of my lungs and until I was out of breath:

I wanna go home with you, Noah Grayson.

His grandmother opened the door and ushered me in. She was all dressed up and ready to leave. "Where did I leave my keys?" She whined to no one in particular. She was frantically gathering her stuff. "Close the door behind you." she told me as she disappeared into the living room. "Noah's in the backyard." she said, passing by me and into the kitchen. "Your dinner is in the fridge." she grabbed her coat lastly. "Heat it up exactly one minute and thirty five seconds. I got to go."

Backyard? My dinner? What?

I ignored everything and headed to the backyard.

It was a scene to marvel at.

Noah Grayson was swimming, and he was good at it. He wasn't an Olympic swimmer, but he was better than I ever would be, and I wasn't talking about swimming exclusively.

He had better looks than I did. He had better looking hair, better looking eyes, better looking lips. He had a better body, a better skin, and a better life.

I watched as his smooth body glistened with the crystal clear water of the pool. The slight smell of chlorine combined with the breeze of the flowers surrounding the house was tantalising.

I felt frozen in place. I had never felt so insecure in my life. I was suddenly aware of how sickly thin my body was getting. My hair felt like it needed a new haircut. My lips were too small. My eyes too big.