Chapter 15

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Blaine wants to kick himself for ever making that suggestion. The last few weeks have been... awkward. Blaine tries to act like nothing has happened, and Kurt does too, but...it's not the same. They're still friends, but the easiness is gone. It's like with taking away the sex, the familiarity is gone, too. And every now and then, Kurt makes a remark that is either resigned or downright mean, so that Blaine stops whatever he is doing for a moment and looks at Kurt like he doesn't know him at all.

He knows he has hurt Kurt. He has apologized, but he is aware that has probably not quite cut it. Hurt feelings can't and shouldn't be buried just like that, he gets that. But.

Blaine doesn't know what to do. He also doesn't quite understand Kurt. They were friends before they started having sex; surely they can be friends after they have stopped? He understands why Kurt is upset. He doesn't understand why Kurt is that upset. He apologizes every time after a remark that was really mean—and he knows Blaine well enough that they hit where it hurts—but that doesn't change the fact that he makes them in the first place. That for a moment, he wanted to hurt Blaine.

Kurt comes to him with a cup of coffee one morning before work. That hasn't happened a while, and Blaine is cautiously hopeful. Maybe they'll work it out, after all.

"I want to ask your permission to tell Rachel of the nature of our marriage," Kurt says, the words sounding formal and as if he had practiced them.

"I need to talk to her about something, and I can only do that if she knows." He smiles wryly. "She won't tell anyone. I have my ways to get her to be quiet."

Kurt's posture is rigid despite the smile, his hands clenched into fists, and Blaine knows better than to ask what he wants to talk to her about.

"Anything," he says. "Whatever you want." He trusts Kurt. If he says Rachel will be quiet, she will be quiet.

"Thanks," Kurt says, and then sits there, balancing his coffee on his knees, silent.

Blaine tries to think of something to say before Kurt makes up his mind to stand up and leave him to go to work by himself.

"Oh! Rachel," he says. It's actually a good thought. He's wanted to talk about that, so it's not just to keep Kurt talking to him, and it's even a segue.

"I've wanted to talk to you about her. She's not happy here, and I've been trying to think of ways to get her back on the stage where she belongs."

Kurt looks at him, surprised. "She's not unhappy," he says.

"Maybe not," Blaine replies. "But she needs to perform, you know that. She needs to be on a stage, and she needs to sing in front of critics and producers who can get her back into business. So I've been thinking, maybe she could sing a song as an opening to Grease -"

Kurt shakes his head. "Not before Grease. She'd know something was up, because there's no reason for her to sing then. And I think it has to be more innocent, without her suspecting anything, or else she'll be too nervous and refuse to go up. She thinks her performing career is over, you know? Also, it would be unfair to the kids. They're great, all of them, but they're no Rachel."

Blaine nods. "But what then?"

"Something with other performers, where she is just one of many. Usually, she doesn't like that so much, but for this purpose, it would be perfect. And, not to brag, but if I were one of the other performers, I think it would help bring the right people here."

Blaine's smile is impossibly wide. "A holiday concert, for fundraising or charity. Christmas is close enough that you should still be here, and far enough away to give us time to organize and rehearse."

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