Mina

Like The Rest

Everyday I checked the mailbox with a pounding heart. And everyday that I didn't have a letter from my dad I felt sick.

Maybe it was all lie.

I kept telling myself that it would take longer than a couple days. But it changed nothing for me.

I flipped through the stack of mail again as I made my way to Penny's room, still no letter.

"Anything good?" Penny asked as I walked in, dropping the mail on a counter in her hospital room.

"No." I barked.

I hadn't meant to be short with Penny but I was agitated. And it was mostly her fault.

Penny let out a sad sigh, her eyes cast down at her hands in her lap. My heart tugged slightly, something that annoyed me to no end but that I couldn't ignore. She had done it to herself, become this miserable shell of a person. But it didn't change the fact that sometimes I still felt bad for her.

I looked down at my nails, for once devoid of any polish. I hadn't made time for Penny since she'd been in the hospital, coming and going constantly.

"If I grab a color will you paint my nails?" I asked, looking up at her, trying to force myself to remember even though she had hurt me, she was still my mom.

She hadn't left. And she was all I had.

Her face lit up. "Of course baby!"

I gave her a small smile, opening the cabinet where Carla had left a few things for Penny, two bottles of polish sitting there.

                               ————————

I stood beside the parallel bars, listening to Sarah talk to Owen. I could already see his hesitation and his doubt. It was evident in the way that he stared up at her, brown eyes wide and fearful. His knuckles gripped against the wheels of his chair, jaw clenched, shoulders rigid.

And I knew he wasn't ready yet.

Well he was, he was more than ready. He'd been ready. But his mind wasn't.

Luckily Sarah had an enormous amount of patience because we'd already been standing there for close to ten minutes as she tried to convince him that he could.

She hadn't made any progress.

"You've got this." Sarah smiled. "Alright, count of three."

I watched as Owen looked up at her, face straight. He wasn't going to try, I knew that much, but I got in position anyway.

Owen sucked in a breath, full of anxiety, as he reached his arms out and gripped the bars. We just needed to get him standing. Once he was standing, we were half way there.

"You've got it." Sarah encouraged as he pulled himself upright.

Once he was there I crouched beside him, ready to help his left leg if he decided to take a step.

"Like a pro." Sarah said happily.

She started explaining how he should go about moving his legs. Lifting up and then swinging his leg through but one quick look at him and I knew he wasn't listening to her, he was too busy listening to the doubts in his head. Sarah was mid sentence when he blurted my name out.

I raised my hand up, placing it on his back as I told him "I'm right here".

He had to know by now I wasn't going to tell him he could do something that he wasn't ready for. I knew he trusted me. And I knew I had to be there for him.