My Reality (DDLC Monika Fanfiction) ~discontinued~

Chapter 31 - Deja Vu

Andre follows me through the coded hallways into the clubroom. Immediately once I swing the door open, the feeling of deja vu strikes me in the chest.

"I'm back!" Is what I can muster to say, "And I brought a guest with me!" I add.

"Eh?" Yuri says, looking up from her book, "A-A guest?"

"Seriously, you brought a boy?" Natsuki says, "Way to kill the atmosphere."

That same pang of deja vu strikes me again.

"Don't be mean, Natsuki..." I say, "But anyway, welcome to the club, Andre!"

I keep looking at Andre. I can almost hear his heavy breathing while he looks back at all of us with glossy eyes, his mouth wide open. He looks...dreamy. Then I feel like I've seen him like this before.

"So let me guess..." Natsuki starts, as aggressively as ever, "You're Monika's boyfriend, right?"

My face immediately blushes bright red. Where did she get that idea?

"Wha.." Andre responds, just as embarrassed as me, "No I'm not!"

"Natsuki..." Yuri sighs.

"A-Anyway, this is Natsuki, energetic as usual," I stutter, already automatically filling Sayori's original purpose, "And this is Yuri, the Vice President!"

"I-It's nice to meet you.." Yuri greets him, the usual shyness in her voice.

"Yeah, it's nice to meet both of you." he says.

"So I ran into Andre in a classroom, and he decided to come check out the club." I explain, "Isn't that great?"

I feel the smile return to my cheeks.

"Wait! Monika!" Natsuki shouts, "Didn't I tell you to let me know in advance before you brought anyone new?"

No...

I don't think anyone said anything about that last time, did they? I can't even remember anymore...

"I was going to...well you know..." Natsuki continues, trailing off mid-sentence.

"Sorry, sorry!" I apologize, "I didn't forget that, I just happened to run into him."

"In that case, I should make some tea, right?" Yuri prompts.

"Yeah, that would be great!" I reply, "Why don't you sit down, Andre?"

And so it's the same arrangement as it was before. The desks formed as a table, Natsuki's cupcakes, and Yuri making tea. I almost thought she was going to get water at the school's drinking fountain in the hallway, only to come back with her school blazer covering her newly slashed open arm. 

My eyes meet Natsuki's as she sits across from me, her expression blank. I feel my heart flutter once I see Andre sit next to me in the corner of my eye.

I start conversation.

"So, I know you didn't really plan on coming here..." I start, "But we'll make sure you feel right at home, okay? As president of the Literature Club, it's my duty to make the club fun and exciting for everyone!"

"I'm surprised they're aren't more people in the club..." he says, shifting his eyes to look at Yuri in the back, "It must be hard to start a new club."

"You could put it that way.." I say, "Not many people are very interested in putting out all the effort to start something brand new, especially when it's something that doesn't grab your attention, like literature. You have to work hard to convince people you're both fun and worthwhile. But it makes school events, like the festival, that much more important. I'm confident that we can all really grow this club before we graduate!"

What am I saying? For some reason, everything I've already said last time has been forced back into my mouth, making me have barely any control of what I've been saying at all. I feel like I've said this all before, as almost everything else.

"Right Natsuki!" I continue.

"Well..." she starts, "...I guess."

I look up to see Yuri walking back to our desks, setting the tea pot down and cups in front of us. 

"You keep a whole tea set in this classroom?" Andre asks, again. 

"Don't worry, the teachers gave us permission." Yuri replies again, "After all, doesn't a hot cup of tea help you enjoy a good book?"

"Ah...I guess." Andre says.

Yuri's subtle maturity makes me giggle, "Don't let yourself get intimidated, Yuri's just trying to impress you." I say.

Yuri flushes in embarrassment.

"Eh?! T-That's not..." she exclaims, "I meant that, you know..."

"I believe you." Andre replies, "Well, tea and reading might not be a pastime for me, but I at least enjoy tea."

"I'm glad..." Yuri comments.

They both continue talking about reading, me contently listening.

"So, Andre, what kinds of things do you like to read?" Yuri asks.

"Well..ah.." he trails off, embarrassed.

"..manga.." he answers.

I expected that. Natsuki lifts her head in interest, clearly enthused with manga.

"N-Not much of a reader, I guess." Yuri replies.

I immediately stop listening to their deemed conversation once I realize it's the same one they've had before. Or, at least I remember them having before. Doesn't Andre know? Surely, he must be feeling at least some deja vu as well. I get anxious again once I ponder about the future. What's left for me here? Him? My world's always felt so blank and tired. It isn't real, that's why. What's going to happen in this so-called, new reality? There's no doubt that Yuri and Natsuki still make me enraged, no doubt about that. 

The same events recycle themselves. Me saying things I know I've already said, but not being able to help it. 

I announce the upbringing of us writing poems every single day, and Andre officially joins the club.

"Okay everyone!" I call, "I think with that, we can officially end today's meeting on a good note. Everyone remember tonight's assignment. Write a poem to bring to the next meeting, so we can all share! Andre, I look forward to seeing how you express yourself." I finally say, even though I'm completely aware his poems are all just a bunch of words.

I giggle awkwardly. 

"Y-Yeah.." Andre stutters, "I guess I'll be on my way then.."

"Okay!" I reply, "I'll see you tomorrow then! I can't wait!"

I see him walk out the door, leaving the world around me to flash into the black void,  the flashing lights and pulsating audio-waves ever so violent. Another day...