Why Did I Get Married; Part One ☾☀︎ Camren

Bonus Chapter #3

Camila pulled away and wiped at her eyes. "I...I can't."

***

Lauren London said "Grief is the final act of love." And I've always known that you can't have love without pain and you can't be pained without love being there.

Loving is an overall agreement that one day, there's going to be hurt, and you accept that because you love.

There was a knock on Camila's bedroom door, her mother opened it, and saw her sitting on her bed, staring at nothing in particular. Camila turned her head and locked eyes with her mother, and that was enough to tell her what she had been anticipating for the past few days after hearing about her father's condition.

Sinu didn't say anything, but she knew that Camila had understood. She shut the door on her way out, knowing that Camila would need time herself.

To grieve on her own terms.

The thing what had hurt Camila the most was that she knew it was coming, but for the life of her, she couldn't push the hurt away. How could she? How could she push years and years of hurt away just for one minute?

It's a lot harder than you would think.

Camila hadn't slept that day. She didn't want to close her eyes because she was scared of seeing him in her dreams. She didn't want to be reminded of the man who broke her heart.

The man who she loved.

"Mila," Dinah said sadly once she saw her best friend curled up on the floor. Her cheeks were tear stained, her eyes were puffy from crying the entire night. Her appearance was disheveled, but saddening. Dinah sat next to her best friend and pulled her into her arms. "I'm here, I'm here." She repeated into Camila's ears as she held her.

"He's...he's really gone, Dinah..." Camila said softly. "He's gone."

I've never understood how a father could hurt their child. The one he helped to create. I've always wondered what was running through their minds when you decide to leave your child behind.

It's going to be tough. He'll leave without an explanation but you'll get through it. You'll miss the relationship you never had.

You'll miss the fatherly advice and the dad jokes. You'll miss it all, even if you never got a chance to experience them.

You'll miss out on the love a father gives to his child. On the best friend that cares and would never leave you no matter what.

I believe that everything does happen for a reason though. Parties, birthdays, deaths, good or bad grades, missed opportunities, mistakes, rejection. Everything happens for a reason and most times, we have absolutely no clue as to what that reason is.

We don't know why we got rejected or why we got that bad grade when we did everything in our power not to.

It doesn't make sense because we don't know why.

As people, we're so invested in the loss, that we don't realise the gain out of the situations. At times, 'bad things' may happen to us because there's a possibility that there's something 'better' in store for us.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Dinah asked her friend softly. Camila sniffled and pulled away from the embrace.

"I don't know how to f-feel," Camila wiped at her eyes. No matter how hard she tried to stop the tears from falling, they always managed to break free. "I'm angry. I'm sad. I'm empty. I'm just so confused."