THE VISION IS A PLACE | ✓ {complete}

Chapter 58 : hit

"Yeah, the same way you randomly asked me about angels," he responds, coldly.

"It wasn't random."

"Okay. Why do you think he was asking about it, then?" Jai challenges.

"I don't know. Maybe he saw something."

"Did you not hear what I said? There's never been anything like that here," he spells out.

Jai knows nothing. If he could feel anything—anything at all—then maybe I wouldn't have been the only one to see that green light in the woods. Kyle's been right here with us, ever since the night he was left out there. What if I wasn't the only one to sense something, and that's why Noah asked him about ghosts? What if Kyle tried with Noah, too? What if Noah saw the light?

I push my chair back. The wooden legs cry against the floor.

"What are you doing?" Heath asks.

"May I be excused?"

"No."

"Then may I go to the bathroom?"

"He said, No," Jai reiterates, with a forced dominance that makes me cringe. It's like he's trying to show Heath 'how it's done', but that tone only reminds me of my brother. It makes me hate him.

I look to Heath, hoping he'll change his mind.

He doesn't.

"Push your seat in," Addison says to me, quietly.

I almost listen to him, but by the time that thought comes and goes I'm already standing.

"Sit down," Heath commands, his voice still hovering somewhere below full volume.

I shake my head. "No."

Heath's grip tightens on his fork. He composes himself and then looks up at me. "Casten, sit back down, please."

"You forcing this family shit on us right now isn't helping anyone. It's suffocating. All this pretending—no one wants to be here right now."

"Why do you have to do this?" Anna asks, begging me to stop.

"It's called making an effort, Casten," Heath says. "It's been a long fucking while since you've actually tried to be a part of this family."

"I've been fucking trying, Heath! Everyday, but you're making it impossible!"

"It's not easy for anyone!" Heath yells

"Then show me! This is exactly what I mean about pretending. Show me that it's hard for you, too. Don't just sit here and look at me like I'm the only loose thread. Like it's my fault this is happening."

"She just wants everyone to be as fucked up as she is," Jai says.

Fuck you—

"Fuck off, Jai," Addison says.

I feel like I'm floating a few inches outside of my body, just watching like everybody else. It's like I've lost the controls to this person I'm stuck as. I wish Heath could see that and just let me go before I say something I can't take back. This isn't me. I don't want to be island, but the words leaving past my lips are begging for it before I can stop them.

"You really want to leave this table right now?" Heath asks.

I nod.

"You always want to be alone. Must be nice...not needing anyone. You can do everything on your own, right?"

"I never said that."

"But you keep trying to leave—to walk away. You really think you're going to come back any different? You really think closing yourself off is going to help you?"