Kiwi Wives

12

Diana's

It was all fun and games until we lost. Masyado kaming naging kampante. Lahat kami halos minaliit namin itong task na ito kaya sa dulo kaming lahat ang nagdusa. Kuya tried to keep us from failing by cutting off our water supply till we could no longer take a bath but still, we kept on repeating our mistakes and we ended up losing.

I was assigned as task leader yet I failed to lead such a simple task. I was guilty for our failures and I liked to take the blame because even from the beginning I knew I lacked part in this task. I wasn't strict. I was very lenient with how they handled the balloons. I should have devised a plan or a strategy to get hold of the balloons more but I didn't. I underestimated the difficulty of this task and because of this, I failed everyone.

I'm not a person who is very open to talk about my own feelings so I chose to give an encouraging and accepting smile upon Kuya's announcement of our loss. I've always kept my emotions to myself and got used with it. I told no one that I was devastated with our loss because I didn't want to be blamed or be misunderstood by the persons important to me in this house so I hid it for myself. But of course, Franki is way different than I am.

She blamed herself as she was the last one to lose the balloon but all of us did not mind her mistake considering she's the one who laid the most effort for this task. Akalain niyo iyon? Franki, my co-leader, stepped down from her slumber mood and actually contributed the most. She encouraged everyone even when we were losing buckets of water a day. She didn't mind the difficulty of lifting the heavy buckets towards the confession room even if it wasn't her who lost the balloon. Heck, we even swam through the rain with thunder and lightning just to get a bucket of water. She stepped up and open everyone's mind of how we needed to fight when everyone was being complacent and she exceeded the expectations of those who were doubting her.

Franki snapped. She snapped to be better and we were all thankful for her improvement that's why we just couldn't let her blame herself for our loss since losing was far from being her mistake alone.

"Ugh, I'm the worst leader ever. I'm never going to be a leader again." Humiga si Franki sa sahig at nagmaktol. I held her hand and encouraged her because it was thr only thing I could do. Talo na eh.

The other housemates, especially Sky, continued to convince Franki that there was nothing wrong with losing, but she remained dissapointed. I just held her hand until Kuya called our attention and announced that we lost another one of our weekly tasks.

Tumungo nalang kaming lahat. Ganon naman talaga kami, we accepted and we blamed no one. The fault of one person is the fault of the whole batch so there was no point of blaming anyone. Besides, halos lahat naman kami nakawala nang lobo so kami talaga ang may kasalanan. After Kuya's announcement, we proceeded with the day with just a bucket of water left.

All of us were being called individually for an interview in the confession room. Kakatapos ko lang so bumalik na ako sa girls' bedroom. When I noticed that there was no one arround, I slumped myself on the bed and screamed on the pillow. Akala ko walang nakakita but Franki was just reading at the veranda.

"Wow. Had to release that didn't you?" She stood and entered the room. I sighed upon hearing the curtains close and looked at her down with a frown.

"I wish I could have done better," I opened up to her. Franki sat down across me and lifted my chin so I could look directly at her. "Me too," she said and added, "You don't have to hide what you feel all the time, you know?" Tinitigan niya ako at hinawakan ang pisngi ko, pagkatapos ay binigyan niya ako nang masimpatyang ngiti.

Sa mga ngiti niyang iyon doon ko napagtanto na naiintindihan ako ni Franki. Kilalang-kilala niya na ako na kahit gaano pa ako magtago ng kung anuman ang nararamdaman ko ay nahahalata niya. Pinaramdam niya sakin na mayroon kaming koneksyon na hindi nangangailangan ng pagbuhos ng damdamin o pagsalita man lang. Sapat na ang titigan namin upang maintindihan namin ang isa't isa at sa tingin ko ay napakaswerte kong nilalang dahil may ganoon kaming klaseng koneksyon ni Franki.

"Kilala mo na talaga ako noh?"
"Talagang-talaga," she spoke with her thick accent. "But I hope you open yourself more. There's so much about you that has to be seen. You are so beautiful Diana and the world has to see that beauty you have not just on the outside but also on the inside. I just hope that you stop hiding the pain or whatever it is that you have been hiding because I could no longer stop myself from comforting. You have to open up, at least to me, because I wouldn't have peace myself if you do not have yours." She held my hand with a firm grip showing emphasis with what she's trying to imply and continued, "Diana,  I really admire you and I only wish that I could get a better glimpse of who you truly are. So, if you please, allow me to see more of you. Please learn to open up. Don't hide everything to yourself. I'm always right here to listen and I promise you, you'll never have to shout on a pillow again."

Tinignan ko ang mukha ni Franki. I saw a hopeful face that is willing to care, listen and understand what I truly am. She made me see that there was nothing to hide when I'm with her and that there was no point of keeping it all to myself when I could just share it to her. Franki showed me I wasn't alone and this made me cry in front of her.

"Shhhh, its okay Diana. I'm right here." Dinala niya ako sa bihag niya at doon na ako nagtuluyang humagulgol. Since my father died, no one ever came close to understanding me so I just kept everything to myself. Noong mga araw na hindi ko maintindihan ang pagkatao ko, I had no one to tell, but myself and the pillows I had. I hid the real me from everyone because I was so afraid to be discovered and be misunderstood right afterwards. That's why I built so many walls around me so that I wouldn't be judged by this world who doesn't have any idea of where I've been and what I've felt in my whole life. But Franki tore down all the walls  that I had built for so many years and she was the only one who was able to do so.

"Franki, I'm tired of trying to look fine when I am not. I am tired of hiding who and what I truly am and I am  tired of living somebody else's life. I'm so tired, Franki. I'm so tired." I crumbled on her arms and cried more. She just held me there and patted my back for comfort. She even sang me a song saying that everything is goung to be okay and I just let her. Franki took my walls down and took me with it. Right now, I'm so vulberable and only she could see the real and raw me.

Franki Russel, not only did you become my happy pill and my inspiration, you're also became so special to me. Only you could take down the walls I built and have me broken down to my core. Franki, I only wish that you'll be cautious because I know in my mind that I wouldn't be able to save myself once you make me fall for you completely.

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ANG SENTI NAMAN NG MALAMIG NA GABI MGA KABAKLAAN! Eto na ang update niyo. Pasensya na sabaw ako ng dalawang araw kaya di nakakaupdate. I'm also busy rin for UPCAT so sana y'all understand. Pray for me sana maging future iska ako!

Anyway sino nageenjoy sa mga pasulyap moments ulit sa Frankiana? Cute ni Franki natulog nalang #suchamood. Hope you enjoy guys!!!
Comment niyo kung anong moment nila sa loob ng bahay ang bet niyong gawan ko ng mema na kwento kasi nauubusan na ako ng ideas. Feel free to message me rin kasi gusto ko ng may makakarelate pag kinikilig ang bakla niyong author.