Hear Me, My Firefly

Me and My Demons

My Iife , my decisions.
Yet, I don't own my soul.
Compare. People compare to each other.
Who's the best, who's the worst.
And there goes insecurities and jealousy.
Anger, anxieties, stress, depression.
Name it, I have one.
Tell me who's the black sheep.
Tell me why there is a middle child syndrome.
Is it because of the unfair treatment?
Is it because of comparing to each other?
Is it because of insecurity?
Is it because of jealousy?
Please don't blame yourself.
Because I am to be blame.

I let the demons lurk my life.
I let darkness fell upon me.
And I am sleeping with them.

Before that, I'm searching for love.
I'm crying for help.
I'm shouting my pain.
Yet no one lend a hand.
No one running for help.
No one to lean on.

So, I'm here with my demons,
And they welcome me as a friend.
Knowing it's dangerous, yet they
held a hand, and I took it.
I'm scared. Knowing the truth.
So, I believe on what people said.
Truth hurts.

You may wonder why I'm writing this.
Is it because of pressure?
Is it because I can't hold it anymore?
Is it because it is heavy in my
pretty little heart?
Thanks to my dear demons,
even though it is heavy, even though they are
hurting me, I'm still fighting, kicking and
breathing.
And I didn't know who gives me motivation.
Is it you?

My love. You are giving me
such a hard time.
Yet, I can't nag on you.
Who is me to you, by the way?
A friend? Yes, it is. Definitely.

Did she tell you that your voice is so
beautiful like a soundtrack on a drama?
Did she tell you that your eyes is like
a twinkling star?
Did she tell you that your smile is like
a blooming flower?

Yet, I can't tell you those.
Because I'm just your friend.

Yes. Life is unfair.
And I let my tears
flow with the rain.