Arranged Marriage - Distance (A Nightwing/Dick Grayson Fanfiction)

Fifty: The Veil Lifts

I feel nothing.

Emptiness.

It's like a vacuum draws every ounce of feeling out and casts it into the aether the moment Mai finishes the sentence. No reaction draws on my face. Just blank. Just nothing.

I know Dick's hands are on me. That Mai is still talking, mouth still moving, eyes filled with wariness. There are tears there. That's more than me.

The seconds of immunity from sound drag on, until it returns in a rush when Sandy appears at the door. The blood roar in my ears is like coming back to Earth.

I turn to the left, not to hide anything, but to get a semblance of some sort of movement. I'm still alive in here.

And she's not.

Whatever they were expecting me to say is not what they get, because the shock settles in the moments it takes to answer.

"Do the kids know?"

Within twelve hours our fairy tail book had turned a page into horror. I thought I could protect them from death. I'm not even mad. I'm not anything. Not right now.

Not the happy wife dancing in the arms of her husband. Not the lusting woman tearing her man's clothes off in his childhood bedroom. Not the proud older sister watching her siblings come out of their shells.

I am nothing.

"They're not awake yet," Sandy says softly.

Dick's hand is squeezing mine. Five minutes ago we were stepping out of the shower, ready to spend the morning teasing Mai and Jason.

"Where is Heather?"

"On the phone with a contact at Sunset Police Department. She's trying to find out what they know and what's being investigated," Mai's voice is unnaturally soft. I hate it.

My head snaps to her, "What do we know?"

"Cleo-" Dick starts, but I ignore him.

"Mai."

I state her name once. A single warning.

Instead of gulping nervously or attempting to withhold, she shuts her eyes and speaks.

"So far it  has been ruled as a suicide."

My instant thought is no.

"Never. She would never abandon them." Even emotive words hold no feeling. I'm speaking like I'm reading from a manual. Someone else's mother. Not mine.

"I agree," Mai says, almost like a whisper. Sandy keeps her eyes down, but nods from behind her.

Someone has killed my mother. Pushed her from the roof of the building- our building. And I'm going to kill them.

"We'll be down in a minute."

I turn away, letting go of Dick's hand. He only follows me though. As I reach for the shoes in my overnight bag I hear the door click shut.

Immediately he sidles up, slips one arm around my waist and pets my head with his other hand. He clutches me to his chest. I let it happen with my eyes wide open, staring at our reflection in the floor length mirror. I don't hold him back but I know that doesn't surprise him.

"I'm so sorry."

When he says it, the dullest twinge of pain flickers in my chest, sparking up into my brain. I inhale sharply and push him back, turning away from the younger version of my mother I see in myself and recoiling from feeling.

I shake my head at him, "Not now."

Even I don't know what I mean by that, but he does. He nods with a sad smile, then holds my leather jacket out to me. I slip it on and finish pulling on my boots. I blink and breathe slowly until the spark dies out.