Mara - The Lady Grief (Completed)

3 Lady Grief

2652 B.C.E. City of Tmari-on-the-Euphrates

Spring, Month of Ajaru, One Month after Mara's Rebirth

Mara

I pick at the bread and cheese in front of me. It's not exactly what I want, nothing offered on the table seems to sate my appetite. The Patriarch doesn't seem to mind my pickiness. He just keeps asking Banio, the cook, to bring me something different.

I drink the wine, however. I've never been interested in the watered-down wine offered at my House. I always preferred plain water with lemon and cherries. Now, I can't seem to drink enough of it.

"Please..."

"Can you tell me a bit about who you are, Mara? I don't wish to pry, but if your security is in question..."

I push a bite of parsley to the side of my plate. "My name is Parijan, I was of the Fifth House." My voice is dull, empty. I feel as if I am floating, drifting further and further away from Parijan, but it feels like just yesterday I was her.

His eyes widen. "Ah, she was declared a traitor to the First House." He frowns, "you were of the Fifth, though?"

I take a deep breath. "My Fated Bond was with Thane of the First."

The Patriarch stares at me. I can feel his gaze, but I don't look up. I just sit and try to blink the tears away before they fall.

"I beseech you, Lady..."

"The future Lord of the House?" he finally asks.

I feel my mouth twist bitterly. "Yes."

"He has recently bonded," he tells me quietly.

I feel gorge rise in my throat. He did it. He had me imprisoned and tortured to death then replaced me in a month.

"To Anthea of the Fourth?" I choke out my question.

"Yes," comes the reply.

I take in a shuddering breath, then another, before the tears overwhelm me.

The Patriarch slowly stands up and walks around the table to sit next to me. "Now, now, little one, your Fate has changed. Let it hurt, then let yourself heal. You are no longer Parijan of the Fifth. You are Mara, Death's Daughter.

"I don't know how to be her," I sob.

"You will learn. You are Mara, you can't fail at being yourself."

It seems like hours later when my tears finally stem. Banio plies me with wine and I see Alnue pour something into my cup. It tastes spicy, sharp and warm, and soothes my tears far faster than I expected.

"Can you eat a bit more, Mara?" the Patriarch asks me.

"Thank you, Patriarch, but no," I say quietly, when the food is turning my stomach more than enticing me.

"Save him..."

"Are you sure?" he asks, looking at the unfinished food in front of me.

"Yes," I murmur.

He nods, saying under his breath, "Nateos knows."

"Well, then, I will show you around, unless you wish to rest again?"

I'm tired. My legs are aching as if I have the coughing sickness. My eyes burn and my chest aches. But, that voice has whispered so often during the meal that I keep thinking I hear it even when it's silent.

"Where are you going?" I ask him, trying to build the courage to mention the voices.

"Ah, I little male of the Second House passed away last eve. He was one of the orphans, a popular male, I believe. I'm heading over there to bless the house. One of the noble ladies is distraught, apparently."