Terrible Things

Chapter 26 - Then

But I know that I fear he's about to tell me what I've always known. That he's too good for me. That I don't show my emotions enough for someone like him, someone so bright and cheerful.

That there was no way for his brightness to strive within my darkness.

"Do you think we could have some us time?" He chews on his bottom lip, his fingers fidgeting with the hem of his shirt. I recognize these little tics - they're what he always does when he's nervous. "Taehyung's asleep after all and I feel like it's been forever since we spent some time together."

"Of course." I press a quick kiss to the corner of his mouth. "Let me just put him to bed and then I'm all yours, okay?"

"I'll be in the living room - with movies and hot chocolate waiting for you," he tells me as I lift Taehyung gently into my arms, trying to not wake him. We part ways when I reach the stairs, me heading up while Jimin goes to the living room.

I tuck Taehyung into his crib, pressing a kiss to his forehead. "Sweet dreams, Tae. We love you so so much," I tell him. A small smile spreads across his face, but his eyes don't open and his breathing is still even. I switch on his nightlight and close the door, leaving it open a crack.

Jimin, true to his word, is waiting for me on the couch - two steaming mugs on the stand next to him and a movie already on the TV. He lifts the blanket he's wrapped in as I approach. "Ready to get cozy and probably fall asleep in a position so uncomfortable we'll be sore for days?"

Laughing, I slide in, tucking the blanket around us and pressing a kiss to Jimin's temple. "It's worth it."

He hits play and rests his head on my shoulder, getting comfortable as his favorite movie - The Notebook - begins to play.

Over the course of the next two hours I watch Jimin's face more than I do the actual movie. One second he's crying, the next he's laughing. All at a movie he's no doubt seen a million times.

He's too precious.

When the ending credits start to roll, I shimmy out from underneath Jimin to put in the next movie - Tazza, one of my own personal favorites.

I freeze with the disc halfway to the DVD player when Jimin whispers from his spot on the couch, his voice almost nonexistent.

"Can I tell you a terrible thing?"

I turn my head towards him slowly, my heart bottoming out. He looks so small, curled up in our blankets, and I almost tell him no. If I don't hear it, then maybe whatever terrible thing he's talking about will just go away. I want to shove my head in the sand and ignore whatever he wants to tell me.

But I can't, so of course I say-

"Of course, you can."

"It seems that I'm sick," he says slowly, wrapping up tighter in the blanket.

"Sick?" The words sounds foreign on my tongue. "Like a cold?"

He watches me, pity and tears in his eyes. He shakes his head, sniffling. "No, Yoongi. Not like a cold."

"Th-Then what?" I ask, my voice rising. "Is it a mental thing? Is that why you've been pulling away? You know I've had experiences wit-"

"Yoongi," he says sharply. I shut my mouth tight, grinding my teeth so hard I'm pretty sure our neighbors can hear it. "I'm sick," he repeats, his voice breaking slightly. "And I've only got a few weeks."

The disc drops from my hand and I'm sure it clatters against the floor. But I can't hear it. I can't hear anything except those words over and over again: weeks, sick, weeks, sick.