I See You [REWRITING]

bonus two » defining moment

FELIX

There is no guidebook on how to tell the person you're in love with that you're moving three hundred miles away, and even if there was, it doesn't know Stevie like I do. She'll panic, and I don't blame her. It may not be three thousand miles or overseas but when you're so used to having someone near you – six hours seems like a lightyear. We can figure it out though, I know we can but no matter how many times I think I've worked up the courage to share the news, I chicken out and keep the information to myself, that I know, one day I'll regret doing.

I have to tell her, and the longer I wait, the worse it's going to get. Holding onto this for any longer will only make her worry more, like I was trying to hide it from her and I'm not. I'm just terrified because before her, it was an escape. From my family, to have my own life where no one knows me and now it feels like I'm leaving the one person that's ever meant anything.

She changed everything for me.

My whole life became ten times brighter when she became apart of it and losing her is the worst thing I could possibly imagine. If I lose her, I may lose my own mind and I'm not really sure I know how to function without her. For the first time in my life, I have someone to relay on. Someone who's going to be there when I need them.

I can finally exhale.

"Montgomery, can I have a word with you?" Coach Davidson asks, stepping out of his office just off the senior's hallway. Shutting the door to my locker, I nod my head and head his way.

"What's up, coach?" I question when I step into his office, shutting the door behind me.

"I just wanted to check in with you," he says as he sits at his desk. "You haven't talked much about Berkeley, and I wanted to make sure you were still going."

"Oh, uh," I swallow. "Yeah, I just, I haven't really told anyone about that yet."

"Trying to figure out how to tell that girl of yours?" He asks as he clicks through his computer, his attention no longer on me. "You've got to put yourself first, Felix."

"I'm not just a me anymore, coach," I sigh, running my fingers through my hair before leaning into the wall next to his filing cabinet. "It's harder than that."

"It's not," he shakes his head and looks up, turning towards me. "I gave up my opportunity to stay with my high school sweetheart and it didn't work out. I gave up my dream to be with someone that was only temporary. I don't want that to happen to you. You've worked way too hard for this to give it up for a girl."

"I appreciate the pep talk," I stand up straighter, "But Stevie's not temporary."

"Yeah," he smiles softly and lets out a chuckle. "I had a feeling you were going to say that. In that case, you need to tell her soon so you can figure things out and I really hope it works out for you, Felix. You deserve it."

I nod my head and rub the back of my neck, "Thanks."

"Good, if you need to talk, the doors always open."

"I'll keep that in mind," I assure him as I grab the door knob and head back into the hall. My head is spinning as I head toward my chemistry classroom, taking coach's words into consideration as I walk. I know he's right. We need to talk and figure things out, but it's easier said than done.

My fears keeping me from going through with it.

"Whoa," I say as someone walks into my chest, my hands immediately going to their arms as they fall back to keep them upright and it feels like déjà vu when I realize it's Stevie. Her blonde hair messy, her face flustered like she didn't have a good night's rest.