Running With Scissors

Between A Rock And A Dumb Place: A CYOA Chapter

In front of you is a vegan assassin, and he is about to pull the trigger on his vegan gun to make your mushy, non-vegan human brain go kaput!

Behind you lies a crowd of convicts, killers, and other general riff-raff, all running for their lives. Apparently, police forces have stormed into the Con-Con, and are looking to apprehend the biggest, most important criminals there are. And you're one of them! It's not a good idea to run into them, unless you want to go to jail.

To your left is the stage, with three of your circus-mates on it. Or rather, two. One of then, Dave, jumped off and began to run with the rest of the criminal. The Amazingly Cyclops, a master of knifes, and Normal Human Mike, a man who can seemingly stay underwater almost indefinitely, are the ones who are left. The Amazingly Cyclops seems to be beckoning you. What does he want?

To your right is a very mad individual, puffing and huffing at you because you took his pen. How rude of you to do that! His name is Dr. Freak, and he is very eager to give you a piece of his mind.

In the shock of it all, you actually dropped the pen by accident. Whoops. But the pen is the least of your problems. Right now, your focus solely lies on the vegan assassin right in front of you. If you don't move, you're certainly going to die!

Your objective is simple: escape the Con-Con alive. A task that will be impossible to achieve if you don't make a split second decision and avoid a bullet to the head.

What will you do?

>Dodge the Bullet (Go to B-1)

>Duck to avoid the bullet (Go to B-2)

>Dip down (Go to D-2)

>Stay perfectly still (Go to F-1)

___B_____B_____B_____B_____B___

B-1: You decide that the best course of action is to dodge the bullet. But how will you dodge it? Will you move left? Or move right?

>Dodge Left (Go to E-1)

>Dodge Right (Go to J-2)

//////

B-2: You decided to duck, and just in the nick of time. As soon as you lowered your head, a bullet whizzes over you, hitting the tank on stage.

Now that you're down there, maybe you can land some critical hits on the vegan assassin.

>Hit him in the balls (Go to I-2)

>Hit him on the shins (Go to M-2)

___C_____C_____C_____C_____C___

C-1: You realize that your shoelaces are untied. How improper of you! It might be dangerous if you decide to run away. It must look very weird, having to tie your shoes like that in the middle of such chaotic situation.

It must have looked weird to the Amazingly Cyclops as well, as he seems to be approaching you.

"What this is the happening here?" he asks, pointing at you two with disapproval.

"Sir," says the vegan assassin as he reloads his gun. "I would ask you to please get back. I'm trying to shoot this nice man over here."

"Ooof, problem are big, then," says the Amazingly Cyclops. "Amazingly Cyclops need kill nice lawyer man, either. Which is name of you?"

"Well, I'm Keith!" says the assassin with a gentle smile. "I'm a vegan killer, meaning, I only kill-"

"Yes, Massi-the Amazingly Cyclops really not care," says the Amazingly Cyclops, making sure his mustache stays on his face, for some reason. "Lawyer man are Amazingly Cyclops's mark!"