Those Blue Eyes

Chap. 28: Is It Too Late To Apologize?

(Picture of Evan Taylor Above)
*super long and emotional chapter I'm sorry!*

When I came home, it began to pour down and the weather became cooler. The first thing I did was strip down from my clothes. I walked around my apartment in just my underwear for an hour before I got cold. Then I put red and black plaid pajama pants and my college sweatshirt on. My hair pinned up and my fuzzy socks on. I watched FRIENDS and the BIG BANG THEORY for a while before I began streaming GOOD GIRLS (really good crime/humor/drama show!).

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*I Don't Want To Miss A Thing goes off*
My eyes flutter open at the sound of my phone ringing. I groan and put my couch pillow over my face but the song still blares. I grab my phone and slide the green button across the screen.
"Hello?" I say sleepily, "Evan?"
"Be at my house at 5:30." The sound of Evan's deep voice makes me lightly smile, "We need to talk."
             "For tomorrow?" I say tiredly, yawning.
             "No." He says in a quiet voice, "About US."
            Oh hell no! Who does Evan think he is? He cannot command me to do shit!
           "Listen, I don't want to upset my boss before I even get the chance to have my first day on the job, but if my FIANCÉ wants to talk to me, he needs to come see me at MY apartment at 6:30." I say spitefully, "We always have our BEST and most MATURE discussions here anyhow."
              "Princess, please—" But I have already ended he call.

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        I waited all day in anticipation. Nothing else was on my mind. Evan wants to talk about US. I worry how many ways it could go. Either we break off our engagement, we make up, or break up all together. There's knots in my stomach. I think I may have given myself an ulcer now. But I know I have to be stern and stand my ground no matter what happens.

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            The sound of the knock at the door made me jump. I had just finished cleaning my bathroom sink. I half way hurried to the door, nearly tripping on my rug. Pausing before I open the door, I take a deep breath in and let it out as I open the door. Evan stands there in his sweats and backwards hat. Damn he looks exhausted.
             Evan steps inside and makes himself at home by taking a seat on my couch. I close my apartment door and stand there awkwardly. God, what should I even say to him? What DO I want to say to him?
              "Listen, before we start yelling and screaming at each other," I say already tired "I just want you to know how I truly feel for once."
            Evan stares up at me, his eyes staring at me in misery and exhaustion.
            I feel as if I may break down into tears now. Or fist. "I've put up and put up with your emotional abuse. And I'm done. I've let you come in here and treat me like a damn child—acting like an arrogant son of a bitch! Leaving me after you get all angry and take it out on me without any form of sympathy!" I can feel my tears falling down my face as I get angrier, "You left me here and didn't even have the balls to even call me and tell me if we were okay or not. I thought maybe we—" I put my hand to my mouth, covering my sob "I wondered if we were even still together."
             Evan doesn't speak, he just stares at me as I talk. His eyes remain miserable and exhausted. I'm surprised he hasn't interrupted me yet. So I still keep going.
             "Evan, you can't do that me!" I scream at him, crying heavily. "What I did was childish, I know! What you did was just horrible! You left me like I was dead to you!"
             Evan winces at my choice of words. He squirms in his seat on the couch. His fist is turning white because he's squeezing them so tightly.
           I can barely recognize Evan's voice. "I never meant to abuse you, Baby."
            That nickname sets me off. "DAMNIT EVAN! I am getting so sick and tired of you getting angry with me over stupid shit and screaming at me like I'm a dog! You should have talked it through with me like an adult! Bob fired me because I said YES to marrying you! And all you could think about was how I acted! I know I overreacted and I really deserved to get fired after that. I get it. But you had no right to beat me down while I was already down."
             Evan sniffs, wiping his mouth and tearful eyes as he listens to me. He doesn't look at me anymore, he stares at the ground with his knee violently bouncing.
             "I can't pretend like nothing happened." I say in a whisper like voice, my heart can't take this! "But I don't want to lose you either. I just want it to get better."
             Evan winces, as he wipes his face again. Those blue eyes look up at me, exhausted and extremely miserable.
            "I came here—to apologize for not calling you. I was angry with Bob and myself. I was embarrassed by how you had behaved." Evan lets out a shaky breath, "But now I can see that I have done more damage than I thought I had. Sweetheart, I am s-so sorry if I've been emotionally traumatizing you lately. I've just had slot on my plate and I wanted to take care of you too."
             Evan stands and walks over to me, smoothing down his beard. Those blue eyes of his are puffy from crying. I hold his face in my hands, wiping those tears away with my thumbs. As Evan puts his hands on my hips, I fall apart in his arms. He catches me before I fall.
           My body feels weak and I can barely breath as I sob into him. His muscular arms hold onto me tightly, kissing the top of my head fiercely. I wrap my arms around his middle and finding their way to his broad shouldered back, my face getting buried into his warm chest. Evan sniffs and holds me close to him. I can feel his rapid heart beating hard against his rib cage.
              "I'm sorry Brooke, Baby." His voice is hoarse.
               "Me too." I kiss his chest, my body drained. "I missed you so badly. It physically hurt."
               Evan keeps kissing the top of my forehead fiercely. "I know. I missed you too, Princess."

~~~~~~~to be continued~~~~~~